écrasez l'infâme! Na anyah panthA...

2008-03-17T11:28:00.001+05:30

Rajasthan Desert Run March 2008
A few of us ran in Rajasthan during March 7 - 11. The idea was to run as much as possible (depending on the individual, but target was 42K each and every day) for 5 consecutive days across parts of Western Rajasthan. We were a total of 4 runners: Madhu Avasarala, Rajat Chauhan, Satish and Ram Sethu. The results were: Rajat ~ 175K, Madhu ~ 125K, Satish ~ 100K, and Ram Sethu ~ 114K.
Rajat ran all days except day 4 (52K, 42K, 42K, 0K, 42K). Impressive!
Madhu ran all days except day 4 (42K, 42K, 7K retired hurt owing to injury in sustained hill running in California a few weeks prior, 0K, 35K)
Satish ran days 1, 2, and 3 only (35K, 35K, 30K)
Ram Sethu ran for days 1, 2, and 3 only (30K, 42K, 42K)
Click for pictures here
Overall Impression: It is not often that we do things which stand out and that are intense and enjoyable and memorable - rather life for the most part seems to float by. This was however one such experience, a stop in my life's journey (as Ayn Rand would make one of her characters Howard Roark say in the Fountainhead.)
The overwhelming impression is that of expanse of desert meeting expanse of the sky and my inexorable purposive progress through the color, heat, aridness, history, mystery and incredible sense of romance of Rajasthan. The colors are the very earthy colors of the sand itself, the pink and reddish sandstone rocks, the blue sky, the gorgeous tie die Rajasthani dress with the deep magenta and yellow splashing across my retinal canvas. As I ran through the western deserts of Rajasthan I fell in love with it. I will return again for a more extensive engagement and would love to fall in love with a mythical Rajasthani princess dancing and singing in the quiet even in the gardens of some romantic palace or fort.
Background: I had and still have the idea that I should run in all of the exotic places in India and get to know this country. After the Bangalore Ultra 76K run (Dec '07) I had vague plans of running in Rajasthan in early '08. I voiced my thoughts to Rajat who was very enthusiastic about it. I remember coming up with the idea of 5 marathons on 5 consecutive days in deserts of Rajasthan as a fun target. I had to go to the US for all of February and so this plan fell on the back burner. However Rajat revived it and with virtually no training or planning for the trip we decided to do it. My training consisted of running a few long runs in the cold of March in California, not exactly prime training for the event that we were attempting. I will attempt to describe the details below. The description will be quite verbose since I will try to recollect every small nuance since this will also serve as part of my memoirs.
Bangalore - Delhi - Jodhpur Journey (March 6, 2008): I flew from Bangalore to Delhi on Jetlite. We had to walk from the arrival terminal to the departure terminal (Delhi airport is a mess due to construction) and caught an Air India flight to Jodhpur. As I looked out the window I could see how the landscape transformed into a desert as we flew westward. It was interesting that even in the desert the Indian way of settling in small villages every 5 to 10 KM was unchanged. We landed in Jodhpur at ~ 1630. As the plane taxied to the terminal we could see huge numbers of fighter aircraft parked and all kinds of Radar equipment, a reminder that Jodhpur has one of the largest airbases in the country owing to proximity with Pakistan.
The airport terminal was so charming! It looked like a mini palace, nicely painted and clean and trim in appearance It was a pleasure to see something this clean and elegant and I felt momentarily proud to be an Indian.
As I stood inside the terminal waiting for my baggage a young American girl came up and asked me if I was from California. Well she had seem my socks with the Californian bear! She was from Fresno and so we chatted lightly of this and that and presently we walked out and Rajat was there to meet us along with Sahrika's cousin who put us up at the Umed club as he was a member. Here is where we made a checklist of items needed for our run as well as organized for a taxi and driver to accompany us to Jaisalmer. Rajat went out to shop for our goodies while I poured over the tour guide planning for places to stay and to eat. I selected the Fort Mehrangarh terrace and did it prove a masterful choice! We rented a taxi (a clunky auto with no meter) masterfully negotiated by Rajat and headed uphill. The Shivarathri celebrations were in full swing and beautifully dressed Rajasthani girls and women were seen around temples. As we approached the fort we were escorted into an old elevator up about 250ft onto a terrace of the fort. The terrace was dark except for few points of light which served to illuminate the few tables scattered. The fort was softly lit with indirect lighting and with the colorful and loud city below us serving as the panorama and the fort resplendent in the muted lighting it was indeed a romantic setting. I wished there was a soft spoken colorfully shrouded beautiful Rajasthani princess sitting opposite me instead of Rajat but oh well next time. We enjoyed a simple vegetarian traditional Rajathani thali but not before I got myself a nice glass of red wine. This place is highly recommended.
Day1, March 7 2008 Jodhpur-Oshian: We woke up at 0500 and by 0700 got into the Toyota van after loading all our stuff in the back. Our crew was Vasanth, a friend of Rajat's and soon to become mine. The driver was Dugar (Doug) Singh who it turned out was very nice and became extremely involved in our running effort. We drove to the outskirts of Jodhpur, got out and without much ado started running towards Oshian around 0730.
KML file (Google Earth) of run route from Jodhpur to Oshian
The plan was for the crew to go ahead by 5K and wait for all runners to come by and get supplied and then continue a further 5K and so on. We elected to run along the road because of this crewing situation. However the shoulders of the road was quite runnable consisting of crushed sandstone rock and in many cases soft sandy trail just a few meters away from the road. Occasionally when the railroad tracks ran parallel to the road we ran by it and very enjoyable it was too. I remember midway through the run as we were by the railroad tracks a train went by us Diesel loco horning loudly as warning to the level crossing just ahead. As this was a long curve we ran by the train waving to some kids on the train. I remember wondering how long it had been since I ran by a train in the middle of a desert waving to a train. I am just 49 years old anyway, still just a kid, no?
My running outfit was as follows: A desert cap (a la Lawrence of Arabia), Asics 2130 running shoes, Ironman Triathlon branded socks, Raceready shorts and tee and lots of vaseline everywhere. I also had on my dad's white cotton loose pajamas and his white calico Jibba (loose full sleeved top) complemented by eye shades. I must have looked quite a spectacle running like this but you have to hand it to Indians. Anywhere else this would have elicited amazement, stares and queries. Nothing here! Okay some weirdo's running in the middle of nowhere, sure it happens everyday in India nothing to it lets go on with what we are doing!
We had bottled water to drink and GU and other stuff to eat. I took an endurolite tablet every 30 minutes or so. Rajat and I stayed together and after running every KM we walked for a minute or so. We adopted this formula throughout the event.
After 42K in just under 5h (we were a bit slow owing to pandering a little to Satish) we hopped into the Toyota and headed out to a tent camp in the middle of Sand dunes. It was called Camp Osian and was really in the middle of nowhere. The car had to stop at the gate since the rest of the way in filled with ankle deep sand. It was blazing hot and we staggered to our white tents thinking that walking in this sand was hard enough, how the heck were we going to run through sand like this! The place was comfortable but austere. There were about 12 all weather tents with 2 beds per tent and an integrated bathroom. The coldest shower I ever had in my life was at this place. Teeth chattering breath stopping cold. But boy after the shower the body felt really good and we glowed coming out. We were served lunch by waiters in local Rajasthani garb including colorful turbans. They mistakenly thought we would enjoy spicy food and ratcheted up the spice considerably much to Rajat's discomfort! After the lunch (with no yoghurt) we headed to the tent to rest while Rajat and Vasanth back to Jodhpur airport to pick up Ram sethu. Ram ran 30K that evening and called off running owing to extreme darkness. Rajat ran 10K that afternoon after the morning marathon!
That evening we had opportunities to go camel riding across the dunes to see the sun set. Satish availed of this as I was content to just sit and gaze across the sand dunes and fall into a lazy contemplative mood. As the sun began to set the colors got incredible clear and complex and extraordinarily beautiful. You catch a desert at it's best at sunrise and sunset. At this sunset hour the shadows were crisp and long, the sky took on a myriad of clear and deep colors from blazing yellow at one end to a deep clear aquamarine turquoise blue at the other. The shadows across the cascading sand dunes and the windless still conditions underscored the loneliness and the starkness of the desert and I felt a twinge of wistfulness as of something missing. The feeling passed once full darkness set in and then what a sight! An inky black canopy of sky studded with an immensity of stars shining as diamonds. Orion's belt was clear right above. As I got me some beer (didn't trust the transport and storage of wine at these places) I was joined by a troop of village musicians who setout to perform and entertain us. The lead singer also played the harmonium (a sort of accordion) and accompanied by Indian castanets and a drummer (Dholak). They sang Rajasthani folksongs as well as some Mira bhajans (at my behest) and soon I was lost in private enjoyment of the music, bonfire, sands and the sky! One of my most unforgettable enjoyable evenings! A little boy perhaps aged 11 was with them and also sang and he so reminded me of my son that in my melting mood I was overcome and gave him a gift of 500 rupees. We had an early dinner and went to bed by 9PM.
Day2, March 8 2008: Oshian to Pokhran KML Google Earth file of the run
Now we were 4 runners! It was difficult to squeeze in 4 runners into the back but squeeze in we did for about an hour or so. We drove to a point 42K from Pokharan and got off the Toyota in preparation for running the 2nd consecutive day in the desert. I did some mild stretching and soon we were off. Ram Sethu started of at a brisk pace whereas Rajat and I did our run a KM, walk a minute routine. We soon caught up with Satish and passed him. It felt a bit stiff at the start but I soon loosened up and started feeling really good after about an hour. It started warming up really nicely and soon grew hot. We fell into a by now familiar routine of running. Rajat and I were discussing various topics including a tutorial on accelerometers! About midway I realized that my left foot was hurting where the shoe laces and I paused to loosen the laces. Rajat administered a brief treatment including application of some icy gel and mild massage and we continued. About midway I remember rounding a corner and finding about a dozen Rajasthani traibal women in their finest most colorful regalia walking along the road. This is the sort of thing you would see in a BBC documentary and marvel and here we were literally running into it as it were! Another incident of note was that we saw a sadhu besmeared with ashes on his face alone on the side of the road travelling in the following style: He would walk 3 steps, fall prostate on the harsh ground, lie there with both arms outstreched palms joined and folded, and then rise and repeat this! He was on his way to Ramdeov (sp?) which contains a temple in memory of a saint who lived there hundreds of years ago. This sadhu was carrying a small package which contained amongst other things a lighted lamp that he kept lighted. When Vasanth and Doug Singh backtracked to locate this sadhu the sadhu applied "tilac" to their foreheads. This Sadhu is truly an endurance athlete. He was carrying on like this many tens of KM all on faith and with no high tech gear or support system in the middle of a hot desert all alone.
Soon enough we arrived at the destination and finished our run close to the town of Pokharan which was made famous by the testing of India's first nuclear bomb. I joked that we would be glowing in the dark that night. We decided to stay at the heritage Hotel of Pokharan palace. Part of the palace was converted into a hotel.
Here is a link for full details of the palace.
Here is another link I found histing some beautiful pictures of India.
I limped into the palace hotel and slumped into a chair. Soon hordes of French tourists descended on the place ostensibly for lunch and also seeing the fort. We checked into our beautiful rooms and went in to have an enormous but simple Rajasthani lunch buffet. After some rest I came out at 4:30 PM to see that Rajat had ordered another full fledged lunch and was busy polishing it. I don;t know where he puts it but ton's of rice and roti's simply disappeared! That evening as the rest of the guys slept Satish and I explored the fort and an ancient and beautiful one it was too. We settled down by the swimming pool as the sun was setting and ordered some beer and pakodas. We were the only ones there! The waiter switched on all the indirect illumination to the palace and the pool and soon we were treated to a wondrous enchanting spectacle. Here I was in the middle of the desert in a small and dusty town sore after running 2 84KM in 2 days but enjoying a beautiful 15th century red sandstone fort with the soft night sky and gentle breeze caressing me! My left foot was hurting so much now that I was dubious about running the next day (Rajat had tightly taped up my foot that afternoon) but I didn't worry about running just then. I was engrossed in enjoying the moment, a typical quintessential Rajasthani moment.
Day3, March 9 2008 Pokhran-Jaisalmer: (No KML file as my Garmin 305 started acting up)
We ordered plentiful sandwitches to go and clambered into the Toyota. My foot was really tight and painful and I was limping while walking but I decided to just walk the 42K if I could. We got out outside of town and started our day 3 of running. Almost immediately I had to walk as I was seized by pain and was on my own. At the 5K point the Toyota was just beginning to backtrack looking for me. I waved to get them to come and pick me up. I got into the vehicle and was surprised to find myself almost in tears. It was too bad. I remembered that as I was running downhill during a 4h run two weeks prior on the Los Trancos trail at Rancho that I had incurred this injury. I had hoped that this wouldn't hamper my desert run but I was too sanguine, hamper me it did. While the Toyota went about catering to the other runners I sat glumly in the back and tried to look cheerful as the runners approached us. Eventually I would get about at the stops and try to walk and built up a total of 5K and then called it quits. One think that buoyed my spirits was coming across an oldish German tourist who was on a recumbent bike and biking to Jaisalmer. He would have biked 175K! He had all his gear nicely packed and stowed at the back. I had a brief conversation with him and bid him good luck. After the rest finished (about 5h, in extreme heat) we headed back to Fort Pokharan and showered and lunched and then after saying goodbye to Satish and Ram sethu who were headed back to Jodhpur and Delhi, the rest of us drove to Jaisalmer. The drive was very enjoyable. After searching for a few hotels inside of the Fort as we settled on the Taj which only had tents but still 5 star luxury. We ate that night at the Taj by the pool and also with local entertainment. However the food as well as the entertainment seemed phony. It was tailored to the predominantly foreign western tourists that seemed to frequent the Taj and didn't at all appeal to me especially after my previous exotic and genuine experiences in the heart of Rajasthan desert. Still the lighted jaisalmer fort was a beautiful picture in the distance and was enjoyable. That night Rajat was limping quite badly and had blisters and dead clots on his toes and the 4th day start seemed doubtful.
Day 4, March 10, 2008: Around Jaisalmeer:
Sure enough, the morning of the 4th day found all of us snoring our heads of and not in any rush to get anywhere. Eventually I got up and showered and broke my fast and headed out for some sight seeing leaving the others slumbering or watching TV in the room. I went and saw the cenotaphs of the kings and queens amidst towing numerous Suzlon wind turbines on the high Rajasthani hill plains. I also visited a very beautiful Haveli in the heart of old town. The picture below is taken from a window overlooking the narrow streets of the old town.
I then proceeded to find a good place to eat and failed. There are not many clean good places to eat in Jaisalmeer. Most places are fly infested including Little Italy one of my favorite restaurant chains. That evening we went drove out 42K to a place called Khuri where there are some nice towering sand dunes. After warding of nuisance from Camel owners insistent on giving me a ride (for a price of course) I slowly climbed up the dunes and enjoyed a spectacular sunset amidst the dunes amidst a pack of German tourists.
Day 5, March 11, 2008: We decided to run the desert alongside the road to Khuri. Rajat started off his run and I started to walk. I walked for about 30 minutes and then to test my leg stated a shuffle jog. This felt pretty good. Encouraged I started a slow run. Still not bad. I now started to run slow and kept this up for the next 3 hours. Interestingly in my attempt to protect my left foot I must have adjusted my gait so much so that other parts of my leg started to hurt. After about 35K all parts of my lower legs were starting to hurt. Nevertheless I wanted to finish 42K but it was already 1PM and we had to checkout, eat, shower, and catch a train at 4PM. So I stopped after 35K. We duly caught the train at 4PM and ended up in Old Delhi by about 12 noon on 12th March. So ended this somewhat remarkable journey! Before I returned to Bangalore I hired a taxi to take me to the Taj Mahal. The journey was pretty bad through dirty North Indian towns and unruly roads. If someone were to ask my comments on the Taj Mahal I would reply just as a Wodehouse character that all in all "it is a pretty decent tomb". That and no more!

2007-12-18T14:50:00.001+05:30

1st ever Bangalore UltraMarathon Dec. 16, 2007

I sent out my 1st mail about this topic Some time in October 2006! Check this mail out to see how closely we have accomplished what we set out to do. Note that we started more than one year ago albeit serious effort started some time in March 2007.
I did 76K in 9h. This is pretty good for me. My previous best was 10h18m for the AR50 in 2003 for 80K. Assuming an 8.5min/K for the rest of the 4K even I time for 80K would be estimated at 9h 36m. I badly wanted to go for one more lap but was worried lest I aggravated my injured hamstring.
I can categorize my feelings towards this Ultra on 3 levels: Organizer, runner, and general.
As a Runner : The course was of course beautiful. The weather was also perfect although I had hoped for cloudy weather as it was a few days prior. I felt pretty good for most of the race and started out a bit too fast. My initial pace for the 1st few hours was at 6'10" and then slowly started increasing. At about the 50K mark my quads were starting to feel heavy and so I took a 200mg Ibuprofen tablet and soon felt better. I was leery of hurting my left hamstring and so was very conservative and didn't want to push. My pace at the end turned out to be 7'10", quite poor. Although I wanted to attempt 91K and had plenty of time worry of my hamstring commanded me to be satisfied with my effort. I had PBJ sandwiches , chips, bananas and Gatorade. The Gatorade started to get to me after 8h. I took endurolyte tablets every 30min and had no cramps whatsoever although my face was thickly encrusted with dried salt! The Jujubes were wonderful. It was definitely a treat to see all the runners go by so often. The enthusiasm and smiles of everyone was so contagious. The energy level and enthusiasm of Sabine was just awesome. What a person! I passed by her so many times on our criss cross and I would brace myself to try match her enthusiasm. Her group would setup a huge vociferous hello that echoed over hill and dale. I remember at one point after they went by and the dust settled that the entire dog contingent of the nearby village set off loud barking disturbed by the Sabine tornado that had just swept by.
I thought that the start was a bit rushed and the finish was slack and lacked enthusiasm and structure as most of the people had left and nobody came to give me my medal and certificate etc since I came in 9h after start of race and probably the staff were tired by then. As a runner I enjoyed the event and accomplished my goal of at least 78K.
The spirit of medical teams at the aid stations was unbelievable. They were so friendly, enthusiastic, knowledgeable, and persevering throughout a tiring day. I always felt that I had died and gone to heaven when I approached an aid station to be greeted by these angels. I have not seen this quality of medical personnel staffing an event at any international Ultra event of my experience (I am not talking of the WS100, etc, but the local 50K, 100K type events). Of course forget about the marathons. There you pick up a water cup and keep going. Zero support before, during, and after a race.)

As an Organizer:

Broadly we achieved what we set out to do-to showcase a proper world class Ultra for the 1st time in India that anyone with suitable training can participate in. The approbations flowing in from the participants is vocal testament to the success of the event.
Not enough participants stayed overnight prior to race perhaps owing to price of stay. In reality it is difficult to get class accommodation for less than INR3000.
Not enough families attended the event. In the US there is a huge presence. This is due to a family friendly arrangement in terms of location and arrangements (lunch, etc). The cost of bringing family to ONV was too high and the access was difficult. On the other hand I also thought the modern Indian culture (being too fussy) had a large part to play.
We couldn't get an all dirt trail. Even 4w ago it was 99% mostly trail but then just recently someone paved it. Go figure huh! No pavement when one wants it in busy parts of town but some outlying area where we least expect and they pave it!
Aid stations: The fruits (melon) should have been ready and available from start but was not. Also the water and Gatorade was mostly not cold nor was it kept in jugs with ice to be dispensed quickly. The volunteers did not offer to fill bottles and screw / unscrew cap.
The Start of the event was rushed. We should have had at least 15m of starting ceremony / information to properly set the runners. (I did not have time to get off my Henry 5th's Crispian Day speech suitably parodied for the Ultra)
The Atmosphere at the finish was indeed poor. There were hardly any people left to cheer and even the event staff seemed tired and listless. As long as the 52K finishers were happy I am not complaining since there were very few 78K runners.
Lunch was closed after 3PM and so I could only get sandwiches. This seems trite but it is important to wind down after a long race and enjoy a post race meal in the company of running friends and family. In the US especially for the Quicksilver Ultra the barbQ is always open from 12PM to closing time and after for late finishers. The barbQ is also of a very high quality and is open to friends and family of runners with no account kept of number.

General:
To gt a feel for the character of the event it is best to take a look at Sabine's uploaded pictures here and here. You can see that the predominant theme is joy! Everyone is smiling! Sabine seems to have captured practically every participant and they are all without exception smiling. What can be sweeter than that! The 2nd is the dynamism. All pictures show dynamic purposive motion. The 3rd is the topography of the run- a vastness, a wideness, a sense of space and openness, of wind swept plains. An integration of these three central attributes will serve to give some indication of the theme or spirit of the event as felt by the participants.
I will close with another feeling that of wistful poignancy which is uncharacteristic of me since I am an upbeat person. As I was running uphill on the trail out by the wall for my final lap I was understandably engrossed in my struggle with the slope and the heat. I suddenly saw a small puppy. It must have been 4w old or less and seemed weak and diseased and was staggering across the trail. It crossed in front of me and looked at me from under with shy gentle eyes while wagging its tail. I felt an icy hand clutch my heart so shocked was I on encountering this shy gentle creature in such a pathetic condition. I continued on and was soon engrossed in finishing. After the race when I got home Malli (My 1.5y old white Lab) was ready to jump on me, her usual way of welcoming me. I was ill suited to receive her with my faded legs and energy. After a quick dinner as I lay in my comfortable bed and Malli was on her blanket on the floor and comfortably sighing ready to go to sleep I suddenly recollected the puppy. What must she be doing, eating? Was it comfortable? I thought what kind of a just creator would create a being born to suffer! Even if under the thrall of a beautiful goddess at the time of creation wouldn't such a just god discovering the error come on winged chariot to rescue this puppy and other innocent sufferers like this? She looked just like how Malli had looked when she was that age and here was Malli living a comfortable life that even humans would envy. I felt sad. For me that forlorn gentle smiling puppy will always be a part of my memory of this Ultra.

2007-11-08T11:38:00.000+05:30

My Apology to Richard Gere on behalf of Right Thinking Indians

Dear Mr. Richard Gere,

Allow me to apologize for the way that you were and are still being treated by the Indian Judicial system, the Indian Press, and Indians at large regarding the incident involving the kiss of Shilpa Shetty.

You did not ask for an apology but I am making one and feel presumptuous that you will even need, accept, and acknowledge this let alone even be aware of it.

It is bad enough that you were treated in such a manner to begin with. But that you felt compelled to apologize to the Indian public by the way of an open letter is humiliating to any right thinking Indian.

Were this to happen in some dark backward country with no history or culture (I could name several countries steeped in religious intolerance and bigotry but forbear since they are well known) this would still be bad and unacceptable. For this to happen in India the land of Sanatana Dharma, pacifism, tolerance, the Rig Veda, the Upanishads, the Savitri, the Bhagavat Gita, the high thinking of Yudishtira, Buddha, etc., is extremely odious and distressing in the extreme and on the face of it seemingly inexplicable. However, it can be fully explained if one understands prevailing Indian culture and I will attempt to do so here a little later.

I rightfully claim to be an Indian (birth, food, language, and some ideology) and an American (by choice and ideology) and I cringe at the thought of calling myself an Indian and be categorized as belonging to a society that could have done what they did to you and Shilpa.
I also cringe to call myself an American when faced with some of the judicial judgments in my divorce case, President Bush, the extreme right wing Christians in the US, etc., but that is off topic.

Let us examine this deplorable behavior in some detail:

The Indian Judicial System: First of all the fact that the Judicial system owing to a fundamentally flawed constitution recognizes that rights of people are different based on their faith is itself shocking. The rights of Hindus and Muslims are different! (I am not sure what my rights are as an atheist). The fact that the judicial system allowed such a frivolous case and did not dismiss it immediately on inception speaks poorly of it's capability for justice. Even assuming that the lower court's stature was an excuse does not exonerate the superior court to have not outright dismissed the case and take the lower court to task for entertaining such an egregious case. Seemingly, any person can file any case against anybody in India, and the courts entertain it without even consideration of prima facie due diligent examination and validity of claims made.
The Indian Press: It is painfully clear after witnessing press coverage of this and other events that the Indian Press has no real passion to fight injustice. If the duty of the press were to merely report incidents then fine-let them report this as just another piece of news-and let there be no editorials on any topic whatsoever. However that is not so. The Indian press exercises tremendous latitude in deciding what items to include for coverage as news as well as biased editorial policy. They editorialize freely on political topics usually leaning to far left, bashing of the West and in particular the US, etc. So how come not one prominent news agency took up the cause of this injustice and did not wage a protracted editorial battle and try to influence public opinion to have the case dismissed? I don't remember seeing even a small battle let alone a protracted one!
Prominent Indian Business people: How come not many if any prominent business persons in India express outrage toward the courts and sympathy to the principals involved? They did not even bother to publicly voice their distress! Did they even feel this in private, one wonders? They are remiss in not doing so because big business should influence policy promoting freedom, ethical government, integrity, and justice. They do take great pains to try influence policy when their business is involved!
Private Citizens: No protests, no letters to editors crying about the foul deeds done! Just casual discussions and jokes! This is the extent to which the private citizens seem to care about the justice meted out. This cannot be excused if one of their own is at the receiving end. But to tolerate injustice done to a persona such as you, a foreigner, a guest of the country, working for the public interest selflessly for a noble cause, is a sacrilege.

What could explain such behavior?
In ancient India which is well known for it's civilizations, heritage, and culture, a guest was revered as god. Dharma or right action was constantly sought after, pacifism stemmed from consciousness of Adharma (injustice) and Ahimsa (non-violence). Actions were guided by search of lofty principles.
If you take a look at today's India very few rights exist. Property rights are almost non-existent. Not a single real estate transaction is straight forward. Rule of a just law is practically non-existent. Might is right. A violent labor union has a right to jobs and distribution of wealth but seemingly no interest and responsibility in creation of it. A violent gang belonging to and supported by a political party is immune from law. Government responsibility for maintenance of justice law and order and infrastructure is practically non-existent. But where mere non-existence and indifference could be tolerated, what is worse is that it firmly exists to torment good people and to impede progress. Illiteracy, ignorance, superstition, etc rule the majority of the people. On one hand ancient traditions are followed explicitly almost always utterly divorced from the reason / sense in following it. There is widespread chauvinism of language, cast, region, religion, subdivisions within the same religion, etc. If there is pacifism now it is due to apathy and not due to inspired following of a noble principle. There is no noble principle only blindly followed tradition and superstition.

Is it not surprising then that people consider it normal and accept (for they make no protest) people defecating and urinating on the street but an innocent kiss is regarded as obscene.
It is not surprising then that people debate the tritest of matters and follow cricket ardently but do not seem to take any interest in worrying about this gross injustice.
It is not surprising that most politicians pay lip service to sobriety, integrity, chastity, fidelity, etc., but are corrupt, disloyal, ruthless, and hypocritical.
It is not surprising that people ignored that you Mr. Gere, were the guest of India and acting selflessly in a noble cause and spreading awareness.
It is not surprising that they focus on an innocent action which any free individual should be allowed to exercise as a right, and not protect you from harassment and dishonor arising form this.
It is not surprising that majority of their TV, cinema and other entertainment is full of violent scenes where obscene, cheap, lewd and suggestive gestures are ignored or actually treated as high entertainment by a seemingly sex starved depraved populace while a kiss, any kiss whether in public or private can be considered obscene.

Mr. Gere, please don't come back to India. Ignore this ungrateful country that has treated you so shabbily. No amount of contriteness on our part (not that I ever expect it to come your way) can ever excuse what we did to you.

I remain deeply in debt to you, to atone for the dishonor that was meted to you in my name as an Indian,

Madhu

2007-11-05T15:28:00.000+05:30

Experiencing and Understanding "God" (Under Construction)
Without going into too much detail since this is a wide topic let me 1st describe my so called spiritual experiences.

There is a mental sensation of rapid soaring or flying into space, upward. (Hence the words such as uplifting, etc.)
There is no awareness of the body-this is a mental sensation. I feels as pure spirit-no material.
The hair on the body stands on end with presence of goose pimples
The space into which I am soaring seems to be expanding. There is a sense of wideness, a sense of exhilaration.
I am usually seated or lying down relaxed with eyes close usually listening to music or perhaps meditating.
There is brightness in my vision even though my eyes are closed.
There are colors-very vivid-extreme in saturation. The colors can shift from one to another. These can be from bright light, a golden kind, a rosy hue, a deep purple, etc. The experience is intense. There can also be patterns in these colors and the pattern can shift.
The breathing becomes deep and regular and as the air is felt with a sense of cooling at the back of the throat while inhaling (dimly) time seems to stretch to nothingness and space is expanded and light fills the consciousness. There is no awareness of my surroundings and I am far away as it were in another space.

I know from reading about experiences of several mystics that my experiences are similar to theirs when they purportedly experienced "God" (From now on I will remove the quote marks and just say God. I put in the quote marks because God as such is an undefinable and so a non-concept and it is difficult to talk about objectively but since most people loosely understand what this means I will approximate by letting go of the quotes)
Now I am an atheist and an empiricist in that I maintain there is no such that as a spiritual entity other than a certain manifestation of matter and that this (spiritual entity) is completely amenable to objective observation and analysis. I am also belligerently anti-religious contending that all established religions are elaborate hoaxes and variants of primitive witch doctor syndrome and have caused immense harm and destruction and very little good. Christianity went through this phase and now another major religion is causing immense destruction in the name of god.
So how is it that such a person as I can get these so called "profound" experiences which are associated only with "revealed" religion and god?
There are 2 possible answers: 1) I am in reality religious but I just don't know it (;-p) or
2) This experience has nothing to do with God and religion but is an experience that is innate to humans and is a response to some combination of stimuli (appreciation of music, art, contemplation of beauty, contemplation of noble actions, etc) and the state of a person and as such is completely biological, that is has no irrational or faith based need for an explanation. I say state because the same stimuli will not produce these results if the state is unreceptive such as tired, sleepy, lethargic, etc.

Let us analyze this a little further.

I have to prepare myself to be receptive to the experience by being in a bright relaxed frame of mind and listen and or view programming that I consider aesthetic. That is I am prepared for contemplation of beauty and during contemplation I get the experience. In one particular case of a religious person contemplating the beauty of God in a temple or church and listening to a sermon I argue that precisely same things are happening: There is preparation for reception of experience and

2007-07-24T16:22:00.000+05:30

Sir Walter Scott (updated July 24, 2007)
is easily one of my most favorite authors. I have in my possession the following works of his: Ivanhoe, Waverly, Rob Roy, and Old Mortality. Except for the 1st all the others are set in the context of the Scottish civil wars of the 1600's.
I have to ask myself why is that I like Scott so much?

His works are romantic- in the larger sense that they deal with primary issues of humankind: Moral values, beauty of thought and action, noble behavior under constraints of severe moral dilemma, etc. So since the issues are of importance they compel attention from the reader. Obviously just dealing with these issues is also done by dry philosophic works which are often disinteresting. What makes these works not so is the fact that he derives these topics of interest from a story set in a background which naturally compels his characters to act in a manner which is of interest and beauty to us. As Ayn Rand says, the actions of the characters enable us to contemplate as things which are ends in themselves, as objects of beauty.

His stories are set in times which although ancient and historic do not detract from the relevance and importance to the present since he portrays only those that are timeless, actions regarding right and wrong, choices made under conflicting circumstances, etc. To take one example, In Old Mortality, Henry is compelled to join the rebel insurgents in their wild cause. He does so not because he supports their beliefs but being himself unjustly prosecuted and when escaped has no recourse but to join. He also feels strongly about the unjust persecutions committed by the ruling King. His believes that he can negotiate and bring about a quick end to the war which otherwise would tragically claim more innocent victims. However by joining the insurgents he places himself at risk with the ruling government and may have to pay with his life- and so on. The story is similar but not as dramatic in Waverly. Young Waverly falls in with the rebels being tricked into doing so by Scottish schemers.

There is also evident a strong identification as a Scotsman that comes through. This is very touching and human and one could label it as chauvinism but since I can identify with his feelings I attribute it to plain fondness for one's native soil, tongue, and food that is hardwired into one during formative years and difficult to root out and if strongly tinctured with reason in not unforgivable. I know, since I have a fondness for the language and food of the region from which my parents were brought up and was such a large part of my formative life and I cannot defend my liking for these.

I like his female characters almost better than the male: Rebbecca in Ivanhoe, Diana in Rob Roy, Rose and Flora in Waverly. Rebbecca is almost akin to a Janaki, a Shakuntala, a Draupadi or a Savitri in the sense of a beautiful high minded persecuted maiden suffering through unjust acts of others but doing so nobly and also capable of love even under tragic circumstances.
In contemplating Rebbecca in Ivanhoe it is difficult to comprehend anything that does not elevate her in our estimation. She is almost too good to be true, almost divine but not quite. She is still human, she still loves despite differences in faith and status, etc. So the physical saves the spiritual from being sterile and makes it more spiritual!
Note that the other heroine in Ivanhoe does not claim such admiration even though her actions are all correct and high minded - None of her actions were called upon under adversity. It is easy to remain high minded when there is no threat.
What about Rose Bradwardine? How gentle, how noble, how beautiful, how high minded a creature? Why are not such women to be found nowadays? Don't such women exists except in our imagination?
Finally we come to Diana in Waverly. Let me digress here to say that Scott has a deplorable tendency to create beautiful characters and not give them enough play in the plot and story. Such is the case with Rebbecca, Rose, and Diana. Diana is introduced early on in the story with beautiful description and engaged in scintillating conversations with our hero. Then for the next 20 to 30 pages or show she makes intermittent appearances. Then she is not to be found again till the very end. This tendency is definitely a glaring weakness in Scott. I want my Diana, my Rose, and my Rebbecca to flourish in the story!
The same can be said of Rose. She is shown to us in tantalizing brief scenes and then taken away to leave us desperately longing for more.

What about the men from Scott's novels? Well strangely enough I am not impressed by any other than Henry Morton from Old Mortality. Ivanhoe frankly has a very small role to play in that work so titled. Waverly is not bad. But the best has to be Henry Morton and close on the heels comes Lord Evandale also from Old Mortality. These two men although rivals in love for the affections of Lady Edith and also on opposite sides of the conflict, show such exceptional moral high mindedness towards each other that I am lost in admiration for them.

There is a wonderful essay on Scott in the edition of Old Mortality published by Rupa Classics, highly recommended.

2007-06-14T16:22:00.000+05:30

Amor Dei Intellectualis: Spinoza, Einstein, Brahman, Aristotle: What do these have in common?
Let us first examine what these are and then we can start comparing and contrasting them:
Amor Dei Intellectualis: This was Spinoza's statement. What did he mean by this? Well, for Spinoza, there is no body-soul dichotomy nor the God-evil problem, nor the ethics vs free will issue. If looked at carefully I would say that Spinoza's philosophy is in essence not different from that of Science. What Spinoza adds is the element of human emotion: Those of wonder, pleasure, pain, reverence, etc. For he holds that there is only Cause and effect. There is only existence. Non-existence can only be thought of as absence of existence but is an experience that no one can really feel. Thus existence of the universe (in any of it's changing forms) as well as time have no beginning and no end. It's a continuous dance. Now Human reason developed to its maximum potential should be the goal according to Spinoza. Since Reason is nothing but acknowledgment of principle based on cause and effect and free will is nothing but free to act according to reason (to the extent possessed) and therefore the highest reason is that where everything is known and explained fully and there is consciousness in full accord with cause and effect. The universe is fully known. Moreover the act of this acknowledgment is also known (in principle; is this really possible?) There is a joy in this since this acknowledgment doesn't come for free and takes immense effort there is a joy in this acknowledgment. This joy is what Spinoza is talking about, that there is so much in existence and in fully understanding so much and that so much is understandable by the simple principle of reason. Now human emotions can be programmed to a large extent. The emotions themselves are empty of content. They just respond to situations. If proper programming is done then the human emotions will respond to this Spinozist acknowledgment with joy and love. Hence the intellectual love of God-Intellectual love in contemplation and acknowledgment of the cause-effect principle, the Human Reason, all the knowledge that flows from this, and finally acting without free will (free will is a meaningless term at best at this point). This is an exalted view of man and there is something in this that is breathtaking. Man rising from the dust....gas...slime...tending towards towards dare I say it..God!
Albert Einstein's view of God and Universe
It is ironic that there is so much material on this issue-that of what Einstein's views were on religion. Why this is so is a separate topic (Why theists so desperately look for sanction from science while spitting on all its main tenets such as big bang, evolution, cause-effect, etc.)
Here is material from Wikipedia:

Einstein told Rabbi Herbert S. Goldstein "I believe in Spinoza's God, who reveals Himself in the lawful harmony of the world, not in a God Who concerns Himself with the fate and the doings of mankind." (Brian 1996, p. 127)

Einstein defined his religious views in a letter he wrote in response to those who claimed that he worshiped a Judeo-Christian god: "It was, of course, a lie what you read about my religious convictions, a lie which is being systematically repeated. I do not believe in a personal God and I have never denied this but have expressed it clearly. If something is in me which can be called religious then it is the unbounded admiration for the structure of the world so far as our science can reveal it."^[37]^[38]

By his own definition, Einstein was a deeply religious person (Pais 1982, p. 319).^[39] He published a paper in Nature in 1940 entitled Science and Religion which gave his views on the subject.^[40] In this he says that: "a person who is religiously enlightened appears to me to be one who has, to the best of his ability, liberated himself from the fetters of his selfish desires and is preoccupied with thoughts, feelings and aspirations to which he clings because of their super-personal value ... regardless of whether any attempt is made to unite this content with a Divine Being, for otherwise it would not be possible to count Buddha and Spinoza as religious personalities. Accordingly a religious person is devout in the sense that he has no doubt of the significance of those super-personal objects and goals which neither require nor are capable of rational foundation ... In this sense religion is the age-old endeavor of mankind to become clearly and completely conscious of these values and goals, and constantly to strengthen their effects." He argues that conflicts between science and religion "have all sprung from fatal errors." However "even though the realms of religion and science in themselves are clearly marked off from each other" there are "strong reciprocal relationships and dependencies" ... "science without religion is lame, religion without science is blind ... a legitimate conflict between science and religion cannot exist." However he makes it clear that he does not believe in a personal God, and suggests that "neither the rule of human nor Divine Will exists as an independent cause of natural events. To be sure, the doctrine of a personal God interfering with natural events could never be refuted ... by science, for [it] can always take refuge in those domains in which scientific knowledge has not yet been able to set foot." (Einstein 1940, pp. 605–607)

There is other material giving detail about Einsteins statements about God but these will do. Clearly he is not different from Spinoza in this regard-not surprising since Spinoza was his favorite philosopher. One thing always bothered me about Einstein: His remark that Religion and Science are clearly marked off from each other.
He must have meant that religion serves other needs that Science at present is unable to serve such as: comfort in faith in loss of loved ones, simple explanations for difficult questions for which Science will take some time to fully answer, etc. I am sure he did not mean that any area of knowledge was closed to Science. His statements taken in sum clearly indicate otherwise.
Einstein always had wonder and awe that the Universe was so complex and at the same time so understandable that too by using simple reason and cause and effect as the epistemological principle. This parallels the Amor Dei Intelectualis of Spinoza. Also like Spinoza, Einstein had compassion for suffering. Reason allied with compassion is sure a wonderful combination ina person. It makes the person the highest form of saint possible.

Sat-Chit-Ananda and Brahman of Hindu Vedanta:
Wikepedia has very conveniently for us an adequate description of Brahman for us. Brahman is essentially the universe in its entirety; what is, what was, what will be.

Brahman (nominative brahma ब्रह्म) is the concept of the supreme spirit found in Hinduism. Brahman is the unchanging, infinite, immanent, and transcendent reality which is the Divine Ground of all matter, energy, time, space, being, and everything beyond in this universe. The nature of Brahman is described as transpersonal, personal and impersonal by different philosophical schools.
Satchitananda is also adequately described in Wikepedia as:
Satchitananda (Sanskrit: सच्चिदानंद) is a devanagari compound of three Sanskrit words, Sat (सत्), Chit (चित्), and Ānanda (आनंद) (the ā is of longer vocal length), meaning True Being, Pure Consciousness and Bliss respectively. The expression is used in Yoga and other schools of Indian philosophy to describe the nature of Brahman as experienced by a fully liberated yogin.
So the aspect of the yogi meditating and contemplating on the Brahman and getting immersed and part of it (which is the goal) is not different from Spinoza's Amor Dei Intellectualis. Granted there are eastern / western nuances to be gotten rid of here. Also, the traditional Brahman realization shuns the material or gross aspect of creation. However there is nothing that forbids it. So I would argue that joy, wonder, and bliss that an Einstein got from contemplating the order and beauty of the universe is not different (should not be, anyway) from the experience of a yogi contemplating the Brahman. Unfortunately for the Indian yogi contemplation of Brahman does not give any knowledge of the material world at all. There is just consciousness of the moment and perhaps other emotional experiences such as travel, colors, light flashes, etc, seemingly in an another (claimed spiritual dimension). So a Brahman experience by an Indian yogi is a subset of the Amor Dei Intellectaulis of Spinoza or the similar experience by Einstein or Sagan.
Aristotle:
I found a nice essay on the web and here is the link: Aristotle and Contemplation
Briefly though Aristotle identifies the most critical faculty of the human (as compared to all other living) and claims that the rational faculty is it; consequently the highest activity is when this faculty is used continuously to understand the world and so contemplation is the highest good (joy) as it is the continuous activity acknowledging the universe using the highest faculty, that of Reason.
Now to me this sounds very similar to Amor Dei Intellectualis!

2007-06-06T10:47:00.000+05:30

PBS (Public Broadcast Service)
PBS is a non-profit public broadcast service for TV. I have to acknowledge an incalculable debt to this service. Note that the debt ultimately has to be forwarded to innumerable luminaries and visionaries such as Carl Sagan, the producers of Nova, charitable foundations that underwrite costs of such programs, public viewers who donate money, etc.
When I reached the US in 1981 to do my MSEE at Howard University I was 23 years old and still highly impressionable. Everything in America impressed me. I marveled at traffic jams, at number of cars, at TV shows, at the dazzling lights, at the bridges, buildings, restaurants, etc. I use to think that the Laverne and Shirley show was funny, I was that new to TV entertainment. Gradually things started getting familiar and no longer fanciful, in fact even mundane and tiresome. Most TV shows were inane and boring. Traffic jams were no fun. Earning a living was hard work. I got used to living in the US and became a typical American.
About this time I started to explore philosophy, western classical music, etc., and became interested in intellectual pursuits. While randomly changing TV channels I came across a concert being broadcast-it was Zubin Mehta conducting the NY Philharmonic (It must have been one of those Live at Lincoln Center programs I guess). Now I knew of Zubin. I also was familiar with Beethoven's 6th that was being performed. It was mesmerizing. Here was an Indian (by birth at least) conducting the world famous NY Philharmonic performing the immortal works of an immortal composer. I had not seen this type of performance before. Gorgeous humans dressed elegantly were playing exquisite music and elegant people were absorbed in the performance. I started watching PBS more often from then on. Soon I came across shows like NOVA, British Comedy, Art and Music specials, Cooking shows, Ricks Steve's Europe travel, shows about expeditions to the Himalayas and Tibet, etc., and I was hooked. Let me list the things I learned about from PBS that are now an inseparable part of my life:
1. Western Classical Music, slight influence, mostly my own(I own some 300 CD's and 20 DVD's)
2. Dance and Ballet (I own some 30 DVD's mostly ballets by Paris Opera Ballet): I got interested in Ballet after watching many dance shows on PBS. Now I am an avid Ballet aficionado. Some dancers that I liked on PBS were: Angel Corella (Romeo and Juliet, Le Corsaire), Michael Flately (Riverdance, Lord of the Dance, etc.)
3. Andrea Bocelli: I discovered Bocelli on PBS and now I own every single CD and DVD produced by Andrea Bocelli. Andrea to me symbolizes what is best of Italy. The classicism and romanticism combined. Italian is such a mellifluous language and to hear Andrea sing the softer Arias is delightful.
4. Luciano Pavarotti: I discovered opera on PBS. Luciano enabled my entry to Opera. I watched many concerts aired on PBS and started cultivating a taste for opera, which in my opinion is the most difficult western music art form to develop a taste for. Now however, I am a big fan of some opera, not all.
5. Sarah Brightman: She is an angel come down to earth to sing and dance and lift us if even briefly, into a higher realm. If it weren't for PBS I would have never known about her.
6. NOVA: Wonderful stuff. I got into astrophysics largely due to NOVA and Carl Sagan. Now I am an avid reader of all new stuff in this field. I remember one particular show the topic of which was cosmology, and the 1st few moments after the big bang singularity. The connection between the micro and macro was so intense that after the show I remember standing in front of my mirror and feeling in a state of complete connection with every particle around me.
7. British Comedy: Wow, this was an introduction into a whole new world for me. Of course my formative years were spent reading Wodehouse and so British humor was part of me but still, the variety of shows: Good Neighbors, Are you being served, 'allo 'allo, Dad's army, Old Summer Wine, Keeping up Appearances, Dave Allen at large, etc. I now have DVD's of most of these classics.
8. Cooking (on KTEH and KQED on Saturdays and Sundays): Ah, I would come back from my long weekend runs and relax watching Jack Pepin cook. What an artist! What a consummate perfectionist and nice human being! (my impression from watching him on TV and also after having read his autobiography). I analyzed why he was my favorite cook and it occurred to me that it was just his total perfection and his nice easy way of talking to you while cooking. My father commented that he was a perfect example of what the Bhagavad Gita says "Yogah Karmasu Kausalam" meaning that the the perfect yogi's work is most efficient (I would add that perfection is implied in that sentiment).
9. Carl Sagan: I had known of Carl Sagan by reading his books independent of PBS but watching the various shows with him was exhilarating. He would go on to become one of my favorite hero's along with Darwin, Spinoza, and Einstein. I will go farther and call him the archetypal saint or what a saint should be.
10. Travel and adventure: I first glimpsed Mt.Kailash on a PBS show. Being of Indian origin I resolved to make a trip to Mt.Kailash, Lake Manasarovar, and Tibet. I did this in June 2006! I saw the show of a trek up and down Mt. Kilimanjaro. Next on my list!
11. Horror of injustice: Watching shows such as those that documented the horrors of the holocaust, I would remind myself every year to what depravity nations can come down to if there is no just rule governed by a rational constitution. Seeing the direction in which modern America is headed (Bush rule, ascendancy of religion over science, superstition, lack of knowledge concerning on what great values and for only one time ever, that such a country was founded, general lack of critical thinking, etc.) I am immeasurably saddened. The other thing that saddens me is that PBS and NPR are unionized. This to me is unacceptable. Unionization is same as "gangsterization".

From the above you can see that much of my spiritual makeup is connected to and started from what I saw on PBS. Forgetting for the moment that there are some programs which are distinct left leaning on PBS, and the fact that it is unionized, the service it did me and others is incalculable. This is an institution that should be revered, helped, encouraged, and protected.

2007-05-23T14:53:00.000+05:30

Truth, Goodness, and Beauty (This is Work in progress)
(As always, I am writing these for myself. Writing these essays helps me to clarify my thinking and also to record them. I am frequently surprised when I read some of these essays and discover that I had written something in the past of which I didn't think I was capable of expressing)

At the outset I wish to state that I am an atheist and my conception of God is most closely expressed by Spinoza which is that GOD is everything and that there is no free will (see my account on free will elsewhere on this blog) and that cause effect rules the world. I also deeply appreciate Spinoza's statement (as well as a similar statements by Einstein and Aristotle) that the greatest joy for any intelligence is the intellectual love of god (Amor Dei Intellectualis). Most people will not be able to appreciate this statement. One of these days I will write an essay on Spinoza's ideas and how they resonate with thoughts of some of the world's greatest thinkers.

One frequently comes across definitions or attributes of God and the one that I most like is: God is Truth, Goodness and Beauty.
Now God as defined is everything and as such is the most global or universal entity possible. So does this definition or attribute make sense? Let me examine this (I love doing these sorts of analyses, pretending to be Spinoza, Voltaire, Socrates, etc.)
Now if God is all that constitutes the universe of which we are also a part, there seems to be a fundamental limitation here in that we humans can only talk about things from a Human perspective. So in trying to fully know something of which you are also part of seems to be recursive and I feel that Godel's theorem may put a limit on how completely we can know of a system of which we are also a part. But we are nowhere close to that limit yet and so we can comfortably proceed with our inquiry rather than give up in the tame fashion of Hume, Kant, and several such philosophers and mystics.

Truth:
Before we examine this let us see what my favorite philosophers have to say on this topic:
So what does Voltaire say about Truth?
Humanly speaking, let us define truth, while waiting for a better definition, as--" a statement of the facts as they are."
Voltaire then goes on to say a lot more but for that read his Voltaire's Philosophic Dictionary
Truth according to Spinoza:
I couldn't get any concise description of his on this subject and I am paraphrasing here to the best of my limited ability as follows: "Truth is certainty about something". Put this way his views are same as Voltaire's.
Me:
I agree with Voltaire and assert Truth is really acknowledgment of what is. So I maintain Truth is not knowledge but only an assertion of what is. So this would then be just an epistemological tool in that it serves to build knowledge. So in saying that God is Truth are we saying that the principle by which existence is acknowledged and knowledge is built, which is really the principle of non-contradiction as well as principle of Identity, is God? Does this make sense? I mean in a degenerate sense everything including this essay is (of and inside) God but that is not what we are after is it? We are after profound aspects or defining aspects of God. So in this sense is Truth a profound aspect of God? I would have to say that Truth is a profound epistemological aspect of any questioning consciousness and on Earth at present it is us Humans. God shouldn't care, the system doesn't care, because God or the system just IS and there is no other and these considerations do not apply because there is no need. The universe didn't really have an observer since creation (lets stick to the known universe from the time of the last singularity approximately 14B years ago). The consciousness of matter itself was of a primitive level (or so I think), that of just existence and of being acted on by causal forces. (I wonder if the consciousness of a human in total ecstasy or deep meditation can be compared to that of an electron's). When life emerged, for the 1st time there was a separation of an ego, a differentiation of matter that looked outward from it's organization. Seemingly this differentiation (say bacteria) has a boundary, a rudimentary consciousness and rudimentary questioning, for example, willed movement for food, etc. Take this advancement to the level of the questioning human mind and we can project that Truth is a necessary and hence profound and defining property for an emergent consciousness to evolve to higher and higher levels of consciousness. The degree of height is a measure of the degree to which this consciousness is aware of itself and its universe. Perfectness awareness of the universe is perfect and complete knowledge and it is clear that that is the aspiration of evolving intelligence.
So Truth matters only to evolving Higher Consciousness which presently and on Earth, is that of a Human. Note that it could be a rat or a cockroach in 100 million years if we succeed in wiping out the human race due to global conflict and poor resource management. Also, alas, we speak of the Human as if it were just one but we note that there is a vast range of "Humanness", say comparing an Einstein to a Genghis Khan). So Truth only matters to an evolving consciousness seeking to perfect itself in trying gain perfect knowledge by which it can be truly aware of itself and outside itself.

Note that the so called "Higher" knowledge claimed by mystics in trance or meditation doesn't count. It is not knowledge but just a certain emotional state that they feel is knowledge. (Ask them to solve one real world problem with their knowledge :-). Their frequent and fervent claim is that their's is a "supra rational" knowledge. If that is so you would think that this "supra-rational" knowledge would be a super set of "real world" knowledge, no?) Truth is not a consideration then for these "mystics" and so they have no claim to this Epistemological concept or word. These mystics speak of "Truth" as something, the definition of which they are not clear about.

Enough about Truth then? Shall we move on with investigation of Goodness?

Goodness:
First of all what is Goodness? this is a tough one because there seems to be an inadequacy in terms of succinct definition. Let us see what Spinoza has to say about this.
Spinoza argues that knowledge of good and evil arises from the awareness of what causes pleasure and pain. The greatest good of the mind, and its greatest virtue, is to know God (IV, Prop. XXVIII). To act with virtue is to act according to reason (IV, Prop. XXXVI). If we act according to reason, then we desire only what is good. If we act according to reason, then we try to promote what is good not only for ourselves but for others. Freedom is the ability to act according to reason. Freedom is not the ability to make free, undetermined choices. Freedom is the ability to act rationally and to control the emotions. Servitude is the inability to act rationally or to control the emotions.
There is more but we will limit to this. For details read Spinoza's works. For an excellent treatment see this link: http://www.earlymoderntexts.com/f_spinoza.html
Now let us see what Aristotle has to say about Goodness: (ref: http://www.cliffsnotes.com/WileyCDA/LitNote/id-21,pageNum-18.html
Aristotle's conception of goodness is set forth in the opening sentence of this book. "Every art and every kind of inquiry, and likewise every act and purpose, seems to aim at some good; and so it has been well said that the good is that at which all things aim." This view appears obvious when we stop to consider the meaning of the word "good" as it is used in our everyday experience. We call an act good if it satisfies a particular need. The satisfaction of this need is then considered good if it is a means for satisfying some further need, and this in turn is good if it will satisfy still another one. Eventually this process must reach some point that is no longer a means for some further end but is an end in itself. This final end or goal of life is what Aristotle means by the highest good. It is the purpose of the study of ethics to discover the nature of this highest good and to find the appropriate means for its realization.
Because happiness is generally regarded as an end in itself rather than a means for achieving something else it would seem quite proper to call happiness the highest good or the ultimate goal for human life. However, this will not be sufficient unless we specify the kind of happiness that is most desirable....
In everyday life we speak of a thing being good when it serves the purpose for which it exists. For instance, we say that a knife is a good knife if it cuts well. A fruit tree is good if it produces the fruit that may reasonably be expected of it. Now the good of any object is to be found not in that which it has in common with other classes of objects but in that which is peculiar to its own class. It would be absurd to judge the goodness of a knife or a tree on the basis of some function for which neither of them was intended. If this is true with reference to physical objects the analogy holds for human beings. A good man is one who fulfills the purpose for which human beings exist and that purpose must be identified with those characteristics which distinguish man from other creatures. For Aristotle, this distinguishing characteristic is the ability to reason. The so-called lower animals have sensations, feelings, and that type of consciousness which includes these elements but man is the only animal that can make rational judgments and hence it is in the exercise of this unique capacity that his goodness is found. Critics of Aristotle's view may insist that man has other unique capacities along with his ability to reason. He is a social being who can participate in the intellectual life of the community. He has an aesthetic capacity which enables him to appreciate and enjoy the beautiful in the world around him. He has a sense of duty and moral obligation and he can worship and adore with religious zeal and devotion. Aristotle, too, recognizes all of these abilities but inasmuch as no one of them can function properly without the use of reason he includes them all as activities which may be guided and controlled by one's rational nature.
Me:
I would say that there is broad agreement between Spinoza and Aristotle in this respect. This Goodness is the pleasure or happiness in the natural faculty and since the most natural action for a consciousness evolving to higher levels is to know itself and what is around perfect knowledge and this act in all its forms is the highest good.
Clearly the Good is only applicable to a consciousness. Since God or the system simply IS and so is perfect and complete there is no question of Good or Bad here. Therefore to talk about Goodness as pertaining to God is meaningless.
Wow, 2 out of 3 attributes normally descriptive of god turn out to be applicable only to consciousness of humans and levels below.

Beauty:
Spinoza's take on Beauty:
the quality present in a person or thing
that gives intense aesthetic pleasure or deep satisfaction;
advantage, asset, attraction, feature, good thing, excellence,
benefit, grace, boon; attractiveness, splendor, resplendence,
magnificence, radiance. { Negative values } ugliness,repulsiveness,
unpleasantness; disadvantage, detraction, shortcoming, flaw.

Voltaire's concept of Beauty:
......to give the name of "beauty" to something, the thing must cause you to admire it and give you pleasure....
See Voltaire's Philosophic dictionary under Beauty for a full description. He seems to be saying the same thing as Voltaire.
As for me I agree that there are many things that strike me as beautiful. I find certain girls very beautiful. What kind of girls? Qstensively I would point to a beautiful girl as say someone looking like Christie Brinkely or Nicole Kidman or Gwyneth Paltrow. Looking at what is common between them I can say that the face must be of certain shape with certain proportions to the eyes, ears, nose. A flat nose is not beautiful, a totally round face is not beautiful, etc. similarly very short neck or excessively long neck is not beautiful. Very fat or very thin is not beautiful. Excessively tall or short girls are not beautiful. So the pattern seems to converge to some "ideal" form that I seem to innately have. I didn't develop this by learning. So I must have been programmed "a-priori" not in the Kantian sense but in the genetic sense. When a baby sees a smiling beautiful face it smiles in happiness. When it sees an ugly face with beard it recoils and starts to wail. It has built in pattern recognition for what is beautiful and not!
Now is it just my conception of beauty, this "deal" or is it others as well? Examine the women TV anchors or models or actresses around the world. Take for example Japan. Majority of Japanese women have round faces, slanted small eyes, and flat noses, what we would call an Asian type face. The models and actresses however typically have oval faces, bigger elliptical eyes, sharp noses, etc. So broadly there seems to be an idea of what a beautiful women should look like across all races and cultures. This is definitely genetic programming as this is not a learned identification.
I did a simple experiment before a mirror. Now my noise is straight thin and attractive by my own standards. It makes my face symmetrical and nice looking. I then proceeded to press the end of my nose in order to flatten it against my face. This is a common shape of nose that many people have. I observed that my face instantly was exceedingly ugly. On releasing the nose it reverted back to its normal shape making my face vastly more beautiful than when it was flattened. So just a simple nose shape makes that much difference in conception of beauty? Now you may argue that beauty is skin deep and that it does not really affect the beauty of things around us. I will show that all beauty originates from a human perspective.

Now note how much of the concept of human beauty (that is how beautiful humans are) are attributed to God by various religions. For example the whole Bhakti or devotional worship of Hindu gods such as Rama is by attributing likable human qualities to god except with the provision that they tend to infinity. Rama for example is said to be model of a man(human beauty), brave (human quality), noble (?), compassionate, dutiful, faithful, etc. All or explicitly human qualities.
There is another aspect of beauty. For example there is beauty in music, beauty in a glorious multicolored sunset, beauty in contemplation of some abstract idea, beauty in knowledge of somebody's courageous act, compassionate act, etc. If you analyze all of these the basis is still that of human Goodness and Beauty.
In final analysis then Truth Beauty, and Goodness have nothing to do with God but have everything to do with evolving life forms.

2006-10-09T13:35:00.000+05:30

Malli, October 8, 2006, 4 months old in the Supramental room. It is leaked rain water on the floor not what you think..

2006-08-07T14:55:00.000+05:30

More Favourite Artists 4: Guillame Seignac

2006-08-07T14:49:00.000+05:30

More favourite Artists 3: John William Waterhouse

2006-08-04T13:55:00.000+05:30

My Favorite Painters 2:
Sir Frank Dicksee. I like him because of his crisp clean style, his choice of subjects, the classical line, and the light bright airy coloring. Look at the painting of a woman on the left. Very classical, equisite lines. You can feel the wind playing with her hair as she stands gazing unfocussed rapt in some inner thought. There is a purity of expression, a cleanliness about the depiction. This is perhaps what Kalidasa imagined an Urvasie or a Shakuntala to be like.
The painting on the right is interesting because of the interplay of dazzling bright colors (shoulders and face) with dark luscious colors of the warm sensual background for a lady who seems like a medieval princess intent on gazing at her own beauty.

2006-06-29T10:20:00.000+05:30

My Parikrama around Mt.Kailash June 2006
We entered Tibet from Nepal through the border town of Kodari in Nepal and Zangmu in Tibet. We made our way to Nyalam a small dirty village at 13,000 feet altitude through a spectacular climb. The route goes through a narrow gap in the Himalayas and scenery encompasses fantastic valleys full of cascading waterfalls reminiscent of Yosemite valley in California and Lauterbrunnen valley in Switzerland but on an even grander scale. Nyalam is surrounded by mountains. One side is the snow covered giant Himalayan peaks towering upto 8000m and the other side are the smaller mountains which are soft and eroding severely. The narrow valley bottom usually has a swift mountain river roaring its way downhill.
We stayed over at Nyalam for almost 3 days due to non-availability of 4x4 Toyota Landcruisers. I used the time to climb and explore the smaller hills above Nyalam. There were glorious wild mountain flowers here. At higher elevations one could see Yak's grazing. Beyond were the towering Himalaya's. Awesome to extreme. I also ran for about 1h on one morning and for a description of that see http://groups.google.co.in/group/BloreRun
It was a lot of fun to climb / run at high altitudes. I am very fit but I was constantly out of breath! very humbling.
From Nyalam we set out for Manasarovar in a roughly WNW direction. The route takes us via Saga and Pariyang, typical dirty Tibetian towns. Tibetians are highly impoverished and the towns are incredibly dirty and polluted with plastic debris strewn everywhere. The children are bright and cheerful but sadly, very poorly dressed and dirty. We passed the river Brahmaputra just before entering Saga and the river was badly polluted with debris! Most Tibetian villages lack basic amenities.
Once rid of the towns however the vista's are magnificient. I remember seeing documentaries of Tibet on PBS and longed to see it live one day. That finally came true for me. The mighty Himalayan peaks were to the left of us as we drove west. The smaller peaks were to the right. In between were vast valleys. Utterly desolate, empty of most life, grand and serene! It was similar to driving through the deserts of Central California except that everything was on a much grander scale.
We finally reached Lake Manasarovar. As we approached it, to the left was a massive snow covered and cloud misted Himalayan peak easily close to 8000m. To the right in the distance we caught our first glimpse of the snow covered peak of Mt.Kailash. From here it looked like the top of a Lingam with the horizontal bands of snow and the dark rock creating illusions of Vibhuthi. The scenery itself was desolate, somehow devoid of life and to me not very uplifting, perhaps because of travel fatigue. Usually when I looked at the Sierra nevada mountains around lake Tahoe or the Swiss alps around Lac Leman or around Interlaken the spirits soared heavenward. I thought Lake Tahoe was a lot prettier than Manasarovar lake.
We slept in tents that night and it was very cold and windy. When I cameout briefly I looked up at the sky and was stunned. The stars were so many and so bright and seemed so close as to be able to reach out and touch!
Early next morning I put on my swim trunks and ventured out to the water edge with teeth chattering and goose pimples all over. I wet my body with the water from the lake but that was it. I did not venture to go deeper into the lake. The lake borrom was very soft and muddy and my feer sank into it giving me a very uncomfortable feeling. I came out and dried myself and donned warm clothes in a mighty rush. I came back to camp to see a regula "homam" being performed!
The parikrama by vehicles around the lake itself was a magnificient experience. I still couldn't shake off the feeling of desolation and loneliness though. We passed over to an adjacent valley and there was another beatiful lake with the wiind kicking up waves. This was Raskshatal. Despite its bad reputation it seemed as beatiful and big as Manasarovar probably fed by the same mountains too. We finally reached Darchen (corruption of word Darshan?) and bedded for the night.
We started the Parikrama in the morning from the "Yama Dwar". You can see the Prayer stones piled in the picture next to the "Yama Dwar". The inscriptions on them say "Om Mani Padme Hum" the quinteccential Tibetian / Nepali prayer. I had a 10Kg backpack as I started up the valley on the clockwise Parikrama or holy perambulation around the holy temple of Mt.Kailash seen in the background. It took me about 2h to trek the 12KM as I reached the place to camp overnight. I shed my pack and instead of waiting for my friends to arrive I setout to climb closer to Mt.Kailash. Eventually I arrived at the base of the holy mountain where a glacier was feeding a down rushing mountain stream. To the left were piles of huge boulders. I hesitated to explore further as it was getting dark. With a little more courage I could have gone on and perhaps even touched the mountain which is forbidden according to tradition. That night I lay in my tent and read a Lois Lamour western with my Petzl headlamp. Next morning dawned cold and cloudy. I set off with my older friends and a porter who was carrying one of their bags. We made a treacherous crossing over a glacier melt stream and started climbing up. Soon it started to snow, just flurries fortunately, otherwise the rocks would have become snow covered and dangerously slippery. It was very difficult to climb for any sustained length of time. I shortened my gait to a half step and so slowed my cadence that I hardly seemed to make progress but this seemed essential in order to maintain breathing and heart rate to acceptable levels. After what seemed an eternity I reached Domla Pass at about 18,000 feet. From here we could see a glacier covered side of the mountain that was behind Mt.Kailash which itself was hidden behind. I started to make my descent down the steep boulder and scree covered trail. To our right in a deep bowl was a greenish patch of ice/snow/water which was the famous holy water site called Gowri Kund. I spied a sherpa from our group down there collecting water of which I was to get 0.5L later on. On my way down I saw an awesome sight: A buddhist monk doing Parikrama but by Sastanga Namaskar-that is he would go down on his knees and strech out on the trail. Then he would get up, walk over to the point reached by his outstreched fingers, and then repeat the process, no matter waht the terrain-Immense austerity!
Once I decended down to the floor of the valley I waited for my friends to catch up. One of them was an elderly lady who was doing the Parikrama on a horse. We managed to locate the horse and had her remount. I followed the horse as the other friends were much slower. We crossed numerous streams flowing down the mountain sides on their way to joining the river in the valley. I used to frequently skip quickly over the boulders in my bid to cross the streams and once I got too cute and in the process sprained my ankle which did not become a problem immediately. I was getting tired now and we had a 15KM walk to go. I concentrated on lengthening my stride and started to think of pretty girls. Soon I was joined by some Buddhist monks carrying walking poles. They were working at a good pace and tired as I was it was getting difficult to match their pace and I started falling back. Eventually we started climbing along a ridge and followed the river bending right to join the Manasarovar valley presumably. I spied the tents of the place where we were supposed to camp that night. I slept well that night. I woke up next day to see a blanket of white. It had snowed lightly that night. The Yaks were waiting patiently, probably asleep, waiting to be loaded up. The Tibetians with the Yaks and the ponies, incredibly, slept in the open braving the snowfall and the freezing temperatures, all night. They woke up coughing and sniffling.
I started the final 10km trek downhill at a fast pace. My ankle was stiff but loosened up after 10 minutes of warming due to exertion. Soon, I came to the end of the trail where our jeeps were waiting at the mouth of the Manasarovar lake.
Did I see Siva and Parvati dancing over the mountain? No, not even metaphorically. Was this really the abode of Siva? Well, I wonder. I kept asking myself this question: Why would any god chose this particular mountain? Obviously there has to be a reason that it was this mountain and no other. Not Chamonix? not Everest? not Kilimanjaro? not McKinnley? not Annapurna? but Kailas? Obviously the answer is that in that particular sense all of creation is holy and and the god is present everywhere since god is of and inside creation, not out of it. In other words it is a Spinozist god and not the immovable mover god of aristotle or the Hindu's. Equally obviously, since this mountain is considered holy by Bon's, Hindu's, Buddhist's and Jain's and also from the historical fact that Siva as well as the Linga are very ancient symbols of worship, it stands to reason that the holyness is entirely of man's attribution. This is OK since man is indeed the measure of all things and if someone thinks Kailash is holier than the ordinary mountain then joy to him. That is the key-joy. Too bad though because a joy from a greater synthesis of god and creation is far more substantial.
On the way back as we descended steeply from Nyalam to Zongmu I wondered at the rate at which life re-asserted itself. The mountains were green, full of waterfalls, and seething with life. The contrast between the lifelessness of the high Tibetian plateau and that of the lower Himalayan Hills was absolute indeed. As we crossed into Nepal we stopped for lunch at a resort located in a deep valley with a roaring mountain stream foaming over rocks forming rapids. We had a sumptuous lunch and I remember I could not constrain my enthusiasm at the greenery, the water, the mountains, and the loveliness of it all, more so because we had gotten out of the desolation of Tibet safely.
The return back to Kathmandu, New Delhi, and finally back to Bangalore was eagerly anticipated and the time flew by. Finally as I woke up at home and surveyed the green pastoral scenery around, I reflected how far I had gone both in distance and time. It was definitely a trip that needed to be done, once anyway.

2006-05-26T16:45:00.000+05:30

Free Will

Read a very good summary of the various positions held by people on this topic on Wykepedia under free_will.
What is meant by free will as understood by most people? Probably that they are free to act. Free is probably meant in the sense that it is not constrained by anything including reason. In other words, presented a particular situation to a human, his actions are in essense unpredicatable in principle! We are forced to concede that if this were indeed true then the universe is not deterministic. If this is the conclusion, do people still want the will to be free? :-)

Free will has ramifications on the most fundamental metaphysical questions, indeed, the very essense, of life and the universe at large and it is important to thoroughly understand the question. Therein lies the first problem. Does the sentence mean anything? Free from what? Causality? and what about the will? What exactly is it?
Let us see what some people that I admire, have to say on this topic:
Spinoza:
Will and intellect (talking here of God's) are related to God’s nature as motion and rest are, and as are absolutely all natural things, which (by 29) must be caused by God to exist and produce an effect in a certain way.
The will, like everything else, requires a cause by which it is caused to exist and produce an effect in a certain way. And although from a given will or intellect infinitely many things may follow, God still can’t be said on that account to act from freedom of the will, any more than God can be said to act from ‘freedom of motion and rest’ on account of the things that follow from motion and rest! So will doesn’t pertain to God’s nature any more than do other natural things; it is related to God in the same way as motion and rest . . . . ·In short: acts of the will, such as human choices and decisions, are natural events with natural causes, just as are (for example) collisions of billiard balls. And to attribute will to God, saying that because the cause of each volition is God (= Nature) therefore God has choices and makes decisions, is as absurd as to suppose that God is rattling around on the billiard table· (I digress here briefly to interject Spinoza's emotions a bit which I feel all the time ...So it comes about that someone who seeks the true causes of ‘miracles’ and is eager (like an educated man) to understand natural things, not (like a fool) to wonder at them, is denounced as an impious heretic by those whom the people honour as interpreters of Nature and of the Gods.
For the denouncers know that if ignorance is taken away ·and replaced by real knowledge of mechanical processes·, then foolish wonder is also taken away, depriving them of their only meansfor arguing and defending their authority...
...men are deceived in thinking themselves free - that is, they think that of their own free will they can either do a thing or refrain from doing it - an opinion which consists only in this, that they are conscious of their actions and ignorant of the causes that make them act as they do. So this - their not knowing any cause of their actions - is their idea of freedom! Of course they say that human actions ‘depend on the will’, but these are only words for which they have no idea ·and thus have no meaning·. For nobody knows what ‘the will’ is, or how it moves the body...
..In the mind there is no absolute (that is, free) will; rather, the mind is caused to will this or that by a cause which is also caused by another, and this again by another, and so to infinity...
...·Four advantages of the doctrine·
It remains now to indicate how much knowledge of this doctrine is to our advantage in life.
We shall see this easily from the following ·four· considerations. ·The doctrine is good for us because·:
(1) It teaches that we act only from God’s command, that we share in the divine nature, and that the more perfect our actions are and the more thoroughly we understand God the more thoroughly we share in the divine nature. This doctrine, then, as well as giving us complete peace of mind, also teaches us what our greatest happiness consists in - namely, in the knowledge of God alone, which leads us to do only the things that love and morality advise. This shows clearly how far people stray from the true valuation of virtue when they expect to be honoured by God with the greatest rewards for their virtue and best actions, this ·attitude· being the greatest bondage - as if virtue itself and the service of God were not happiness itself, and the greatest freedom!.....
Voltaire:
EVER since men have reasoned, the philosophers have obscured this matter: but the theologians have rendered it unintelligible by absurd subtleties about grace. Locke is perhaps the first man to find a thread in this labyrinth; for he is the first who, without having the arrogance of trusting in setting out from a general principle, examined human nature by analysis. For three thousand years people have disputed whether or no the will is free. In the "Essay on the Human Understanding," chapter on "Power," Locke shows first of all that the question is absurd, and that liberty can no more belong to the will than can colour and movement.

What is the meaning of this phrase "to be free"? it means "to be able," or assuredly it has no sense. For the will ''to be able '' is as ridiculous at bottom as to say that the will is yellow or blue, round or square. To will is to wish, and to be free is to be able. Let us note step by step the chain of what passes in us, without obfuscating our minds by any terms of the schools or any antecedent principle.

It is proposed to you that you mount a horse, you must absolutely make a choice, for it is quite clear that you either will go or that you will not go. There is no middle way. It is therefore of absolute necessity that you wish yes or no. Up to there it is demonstrated that the will is not free. You wish to mount the horse; why? The reason, an ignoramus will say, is because I wish it. This answer is idiotic, nothing happens or can happen without a reason, a cause; there is one therefore for your wish. What is it? the agreeable idea of going on horseback which presents itself in your brain, the dominant idea, the determinant idea. But, you will say, can I not resist an idea which dominates me? No, for what would be the cause of your resistance? None. By your will you can obey only an idea which will dominate you more.

Now you receive all your ideas; therefore you receive your wish, you wish therefore necessarily. The word "liberty" does not therefore belong in any way to your will.

You ask me how thought and wish are formed in us. I answer you that I have not the remotest idea. I do not know how ideas are made any more than how the world was made. All that is given to us is to grope for what passes in our incomprehensible machine.

The will, therefore, is not a faculty that one can call free. A free will is an expression absolutely void of sense, and what the scholastics have called will of indifference, that is to say willing without cause, is a chimera unworthy of being combated.

Where will be liberty then? in the power to do what one wills. I wish to leave my study, the door is open, I am free to leave it.

But, say you, if the door is closed, and I wish to stay at home, I stay there freely. Let us be explicit You exercise then the power that you have of staying; you have this power, but you have not that of going out.

The liberty about which so many volumes have been written is, therefore, reduced to its accurate terms, only the power of acting.

In what sense then must one utter the phrase-" Man is free "? in the same sense that one utters the words, health, strength, happiness. Man is not always strong, always healthy, always happy.

A great passion, a great obstacle, deprive him of his liberty, his power of action.

The word "liberty," "free-will," is therefore an abstract word, a general word, like beauty, goodness, justice. These terms do not state that all men are always beautiful, good and just; similarly, they are not always free.

Let us go further: this liberty being only the power of acting, what is this power? it is the effect of the constitution and present state of our organs. Leibnitz wishes to resolve a geometrical problem, he has an apoplectic fit, he certainly has not liberty to resolve his problem. Is a vigorous young man, madly in love, who holds his willing mistress in his arms, free to tame his passion? undoubtedly not. He has the power of enjoying, and has not the power of refraining. Locke was therefore very right to call liberty "power." When is it that this young man can refrain despite the violence of his passion? when a stronger idea determines in a contrary sense the activity of his body and his soul.

But what! the other animals will have the same liberty, then, the same power? Why not? They have senses, memory, feeling, perceptions, as we have. They act with spontaneity as we act. They must have also, as we have, the power of acting by virtue of their perceptions, by virtue of the play of their organs.

Someone cries: "If it be so, everything is only machine, everything in the universe is subjected to eternal laws." Well! would you have everything at the pleasure of a million blind caprices? Either everything is the sequence of the necessity of the nature of things, or everything is the effect of the eternal order of an absolute master; in both cases we are only wheels in the machine of the world.

It is a vain witticism, a commonplace to say that without the pretended liberty of the will, all pains and rewards are useless. Reason, and you will come to a quite contrary conclusion. If a brigand is executed, his accomplice who sees him expire has the liberty of not being frightened at the punishment; if his will is determined by itself, he will go from the foot of the scaffold to assassinate on the broad highway; if his organs, stricken with horror, make him experience an unconquerable terror, he will stop robbing. His companion's punishment becomes useful to him and an insurance for society only so long as his will is not free.

Liberty then is only and can be only the power to do what one will. That is what philosophy teaches us. But if one considers liberty in the theological sense, it is a matter so sublime that profane eyes dare not raise themselves to it.

ME:
It is difficult and pointeless for me to add to the brilliant reasonings of the type shown above. Perhaps I can add the following that may bring balm to those who think that a deterministic universe means that we all machines and that is not much fun..

It is clear for Spinoza and Voltaire (as well as to people like me) that the essential nature of man is to tend to God. In a sense the God of spinoza is the universe in its entirety and God is not, cannot be, outside this, and is the sum total, however that be reckoned. Then, to tend to God is to attain or tend to the state of perfection where more and more is known, understood, about this system and how it works. In the limit then we become god and then everything stands fierily clear and one moves in a golden stream of understanding and thought and action-perhaps Aurobindo would have said where all is illumination and understanding- Then all action is necessary and willed and caused perfectly with respect to all other actions in all of time and perfectly understood.

Now one curious thing being a human being-we have emotion! In this tending to Godliness, however is emotion tended, surely emotion can and will serve in giving supreme enjoyment in the awareness of this perfectness? What need then for this free will? what fear then about this? Again look at how Spinoza jokes about free will meaning that you want to act without knowing the cause.
Therefore taking this argument to its natural conclusion, free will is an illusion that asserst only because of imperfect (whether tainted or insufficient) knowledge of our own selves let alone the outside world. To take this even further, it is a waste of time to talk any moreabout this till we thoroughly understand our bodies, that is, give the nuero-biologists, cell and micro biologists etc, a chance to completey understand our chemistry. Perhaps as Godel pointed out if we seek to understand a universe in which we are created there maybe something that is outside this understanding. But we don't have to worry about that yet since we are not even close to being there.

2006-05-25T15:29:00.000+05:30

Running the JungFrau marathon: Sep 1999

My favorite country (to visit) is Switzerland. I had heard of the beaty of the Jungfrau marathon and signed up for it. I convinced my running buddy Dan to also travel and run with me.
I set off (was living in San Jose at that time) to Geneve with my mom, who was visiting from India, and wanted to see the sights along with me. I took my mom around by train to all my favorite places such as Montruex, Roche-de-naye, Emosson, Gruyere, Zermatt, Wengen, Murren, etc.
I hooked up with Dan at Interlaken the night before the run. We checked into our hotel with our balcony overlooking the milky green river Arve! Lovely view! We wandered around the town in the evening as a brass band visiting from Austria was playing waltzes in the glorious evening. I engaged one of the girls in conversation. Charming lilting accent!
Dan and I selected an Italian (naturally) restaurant and had a glorious feast with local red wine. I remember we had pasta and pizza, as we sat on the sidewalk with a view of the distant Jungfrau mountains visible between two swiss cottages up the street. We sauntered around some more before dessert but accountably (carbo loading for the run), felt hungry again. We loaded up on some more mushroom pizza and finally turned in for the night.
This marathon starts at a very decent hour unlike many of my ultra runs that start at 5 or 6AM. We had a leisurely breakfast and with our numbers strapped, headed out to the street to join the multitude of runners heading to the start line. No need to ask for directions! At the start line there were hundred's of runners, gaily (still usable?) dressed in various styles and chatting excitedly. European runners do dress strange I must say. Loud yammerings poured forth from the PA system in Sweize deutsch that I could barely understand. Dan and I took our positions in the back of the pack and stretched and took in the site. It was a beautiful clear morning and the lawns were green, the snow covered mountain tops crisp white - quintessentially Swiss alpine with a bracing freshness. I was carrying a GSM mobile to synchronize with people who were supposed to escort my son and mom to wengen to see me pass through. I was also carrying a miniDV digital camcorder in a belt pack that I borrowed from Dan. Our strategy for the race simple - sight see and enjoy the run - we had no wish for any timing. I had in fact completed a 50K just 4 weeks prior. Dan and I were dressed in just some raceready shorts and singlets. We did carry water bottles in our belt pack along with some GU packs, mineral tablets, and some ibuprofin.

Soon we were off and looped through the pretty town of Interlaken with crowds cheering us as we passed. We passed by our hotel and waved to the manager and the pretty waitress that we knew. We made a wide swing aroung Bonigen by the lakeside. As we swung into the trail part I saw up in front a bag piper in full ceremonial regalia! I whipped out my camcorder and started taping. When he saw me he jumped from a relaxed position to full attention and started piping! It was grand. The roads were lined with crowds clapping and chanting Hop Hop Hop..
The mountains started to loom up close. We passed Zweilutschinen where the river and the valley fork. We took the one going to the glacier carved valley (similar to Yosemite) towards Lauterbrunnen. The smiling happily gurgling milky green lutschine river was company for us on the left as it swiftly flowed down hill to empty into one of the two lakes (Brienz and Thune) that Interlaken derives its name from. From here the quaint and beautiful JungfrauBahnen railway track starts to parallel the trail and we saw the red almost toylike trains full of visitors heading uphill on the rack towards Lauterbrunnen. At Zweilutschinen the train actual splits into two: one half goes to Lauterbrunnen and the other climbs left of the valley to Grindelwald.
We waved to the happy travellers leaning out from the train. As I approched the familiar town of Lauterbrunnen nestled in the gorgeous valley flanked on either side by 1000m glacier carved almost vertical cliffs, I felt a warm feeling as previous memories flooded me. We passed by the many beautiful water falls (similar to the ones in Yosemite valley) and go over bridges where the water from the falls rush underneath happily to the Lutschine river. We went past the town full of cheering crowds and then crossed over to the other side of the river on a beautiful quaint wooden bridge (The Trummelbach falle is very close at this point, a gigantic underground water fall carrying the glacier melt from the Jugfrau massif into the Lutschine river). We turned around to face the same direction we came and then veered to the right to start climbing up the hill towards Wengen. Once again the we saw trains clanking up the rack beside us. This was an extremely steep hill and it was about 20kms into the race: we slowed down to a fast walk for the first time, our heart rates pretty high. We stopped at an aid station and there was a very cute swiss girl maybe 8 years old handing out water and coke. Dan and I paused and tried to engage the little one in conversation with ourimperfect deutsch. The girl was shy and just shrugged her shoulders and rolled her eyes! Nicole, her name was! Once we reached the top of the hill we could see the Lauterbrunnen valley far below us on the right and across the valley we could see Murren and the rotating restaurant on top of the schilthorn where a james bond moview was filmed. we made a sharp right into the incredibly beatiful picture postcard perfect town of Wengen. The streets were lined up with throngs of cheering! There was an extraordinary din setup by them. Poeple were jangling huge ceremonious cow bells which were at least 1m in height and needed 2 people to move it. There were swiss alpenhorns! As I passed the race lookout someone on a PA system called out my name and said where I was from, etc. I was of course trying to tape and run at the same time which was disastorous. I looked in vain for my mom and son but could not find them. They were late and missed seeing me go through! As we neared the town station we came across a full band playing to dancing crowds. It was a party!
Once we crossed Wengen the race quitened and we settled down into a beautiful trail skirting the left rim of the valley below. The view was indescribable - expanses of grassy alpine hills dotted here and there with typical swiss - in the distannce could be seen the Eiger, Monch, and Jungfrau. Across the valley were the vispy water falls trailing clouds of mist. As I looked around I could see 3 green trains headed up from Wengen to Kleinescheideg, spaced a few kms apart. There were placid swiss cows grazing, wild alpine flowers gently swaying in the breeze, the sky was an alpine azure with scurrying clouds, etc. There was a heady freshness, an unsettling effect of such amount of expanse, of visual detail, of texture and color, such beauty, that it was intensely spiritual and we got goosebumps and were high from this almost throughout the race. We were so high, so excited, each time we would see a glacier or a train, or a grand vista we would pause and tape. No matter how many times I visit Switzerland I always get the same high.
We frequently chatted with locals and passing tourists as they were curious about us. We were starting to get quite close to the glaciers now and we could see massive bluish white frozen river of the glacier ice disappearing into the green at lower altitudes.
Incredibly, the sky started to darken quickly and icy rain began to gently fall. It still was beatiful but now was of a starker nature. Conditions can change quickly in the mountains! The trail narrowed to the final section which was a single track, truly alpine in nature and climbed steeply towards the glaciers at the foot of the Eiger. It was difficult to pass people. At places the rocks were so slippery that volunteers were on hand to help if needed to clambour up. At one point I could see a long line of runners straggled along a the mountain ridge almost vanishing into the distant haze, it was that long. With the slope and the cold, my left leg was starting to hurt ablove the anke and below the knee. It was time to finish the race.
We finished the race in the little train junction town of Kleine Scheideg. We had a time slightly under 6h, almost like a 50K ultra run! We got water and food and headed to the changing rooms to collect our drop bags and get into something warm as we were freezing. The changing room was - the turn table building used to turn the trains around!!! The covered building had train tracks galore inside with racks and were heavily oiled. It was an experience to be there and change and see and listen to the other runners, in such an unusual place, all things considered.
After, we got into the train to head to our destination, Wengen, where we had reservations for a room. Of course, we got onto the wrong train heading for Grindelwald and we eventually shelved the idea of Wengen and headed for Interlaken where I was reunited with my mom and son who was very excited to see me. We had dinner in a very elegant italian restaurant. I had Risotto and to this day I can still taste it-like the finest rasam with the finest rice with the finest herbs and cheese - of course accompanied by copious amounts of swiss red wine. Vive le suisse! I dont remember any of the journey from Interlaken to Geneve via Bern. I vaguely remember changing trainsa and Bern. I was that tired. Next day as I wandered happily around Lac Leman in Geneve with my son cruising on his bike on a picture perfect swiss day I was truly elated just to be. This was definitely "a top 10" experience of my life.

2006-05-22T15:48:00.000+05:30

My Favorite Painters 1. Botticelli: Now the above are obviously quite well known. The 1st is Venus and the 2nd is Primavera. He has painted many more. What I like about them is the fact that they are so human and so beatiful. Botticelli tends to depict gods sensually human. Look at Venus. While undoubtedly beatiful, the essentially feminine, there is a slightly wistful expression on her tilted face. In the 2nd painting we see the muses dancing with the lightness and elegance of ballerina's their material human figures becoming spiritual through the transparant lightness of the costumes and their very shapes and poses. To me Botticelli is the painter depicting feminine beaty par excellence. Essentially feminine as in tenderness, lightness, detail, softness of limbs, fairness of skin, etc. Ignore the fact that people say he paints their bodies too long, not strictly anatomical etc. Perhaps he did it for stylistic reasons, almost mannerist?? I first came across term Botticelli while reading a Wodehouse book when in my teens. Wodehouse describes one of his bubbly heroines as looking like a Botticelli Angel. Ah, wish I could get such one!

2006-05-18T13:56:00.000+05:30

My Favorite Sculptures: Bernini: This is as if a beautiful angel is fully poised to fly into the empyrean and at the moment of takeoff has been frozen into stone. Look at the skirt ruffles, the arm across the body, the tilt of the head, the beautiful sensuous white leg out thrust, Sensuousness in stone!
The 2nd one is Daniel. A fine example of a Romantic projection of a human ideal (Ayn Rand's terminology not the commonly accepted one) . One is uplifted by such a projection proper to humans: perfection, clarity of vision and purpose, poise, dynamism, purity of expression, etc.
I wanted to won and display copies of these sculptures in my house. I looked through Lladro's catalog but couldn't find anything interesting. Most extraordinarily I found a company called Deyali Nanji Devraj Handicrafts, 258 Basant Lal Saha Road Kolkata-700 053 (deyali@gmail.com). The owner, Rizwan Nanji is an extraordinary and passionate artist and I have collected and he especially loves the Bernini. Many of his porcelain figurines feature the Bernini angels. He has a Radha Krishna piece which is exquisite. The theme is sublime Indian and the execution is Passionate Roman! Highly recommended.

2006-05-18T13:40:00.000+05:30

My Favorite Sculptures by Micheangelo: Pieta- Look first at the accuracy, the detail. Then look at the sublimity. This is supposedly a scene of suffering but Mary's cast is that of self absorbed sublimity. Picture any mother with a dying / dead adult son in her lap! You can never picture that horrific feeling. What a terrifying feeling! look how this has been transformed and frozen into a serene sublimity. Now to picture this is one thing. To execute? this level of perfection? Michelangelo, thou art past great.

The next one is pretty well known, that of David. This one is not as great, David looks slightly ungainly, akward. However the execution is fantastic. The face and the upper body. It is the lower body that is let down a bit. MAN as a noble upright human being: a beatiful example.

2006-05-18T13:35:00.000+05:30

My Favorite Sculptures: Rodin

2006-05-09T11:07:00.000+05:30

Top 10 Reasons for Why I Run

(Not necessarily in any order)
1. It feels sooo good when you stop because it hurts soooo much while running. ( Endorphin Drug Addiction reason?...masochist reason?)
2. It is the easiest way to keep in shape (Aesthetic reason)
3. You can (almost) eat whatever you want (Gluttony reason)
4. If Animation or conscious motion (De Anima of Aristotle) is significance of life and the lack signifies death, choose to be be Animated (run) and Live. (Metaphysical reason)
5. To revel in the feeling of BEING in tune with your inner nature and the outer while running (Ontological reason)
6. Impress beautiful girls with athletic abilities (Deluded reason)
7. See beautiful scenery while travelling in beautiful and exotic places around the world (Teleological reason)
8. Freak show material for popularity at parties (Perverted reason)
9. To watch Surya Bhagavan as he chases the darkness away with the first rosy flush of dawn. (Exalted reason)
10. To collect T-shirts of impressive races from around the world; to wear and be proud (Narcissitic reason)

2006-05-04T16:20:00.000+05:30

Symphony of Deliverance

[Ayn Rand in Atlas Shrugged- Concerto of Deliverance]

It was a symphony of triumph. The notes flowed up, they spoke of rising and they were the rising itself, they were the essence and the form of upward motion, they seemed to embody every human act and thought that had ascent as its motive. It was a sunburst of sound, breaking out of hiding and spreading open. It had the freedom of release and the tension of purpose. It swept space clean, and left nothing but the joy of an unobstructed effort. Only a faint echo within the sounds spoke of that from which the music had escaped, but spoke in laughing astonishment at the discovery that there was no ugliness or pain, and there never had to be. It was the song of an immense deliverance.

[When I listen to Mozart’s 39^th symphony I can consistently evoke this effusion especially at the opening. The symphony begins with a series of strong foreground progressive flashes of music and while fading is enjoined by French Horns briefly. Then the strong chords of music are re-introduced in ascending frequencies first and then reducing in frequency and amplitude while the tension is mounting upto this point and holding briefly. Up to this point in time there is a feeling of ascendance, rising itself as Ayn Rand says, of rapid acceleration in wide limitless space almost felt as an energy field than the normal concept of space, an energy field which seems to be expanding in the shape of an inverted cone-and set free from all constraint! While (I am) hovering in this state, violins establish a faraway melody almost wistfully-then the symphony takes you away on the rest of the journey (more of this later). This feeling I will name as exaltation-that of never ending joy in wonder, in uplifted travel, in a dimension as yet unknown, to a destination unknown, as if only of spirit-the body here does not get noticed.

Any simple progressions or retrogressions of simple tonal music would and has never been able to accomplish of such experience. It must be the complexity of melody, the complicated arrangement of frequency, rhythm, and amplitude, in conjunction with a mind capable of being acted upon and even taking part in the process, creating emotional conciousness of soaring joy through wide spaces. There are certain Riks in the Rig Veda which hint at such emotions-Aurobindo's Savitri is full of such emotions-more of that later.
My father and I call Mozart's symphony #39 as the symphony of deliverance in honor of Mozart, Ayn Rand, and I guess also our own gratitude to feel such states of exalted consciousness engendered thus. How is music capable thusly? How also such mind capable of experiencing such emotion? Is there any reference to reality? I propose to discuss that at a later time]

2006-05-03T16:14:00.000+05:30

Ayn Rand on Nietzsche

“The noble soul has reverence for itself” (Friedrich Nietzsche, Beyond Good and Evil)

[Ayn Rand had this quote at the head of her manuscript The Fountainhead and wrote the following:]

Religion’s monopoly in the field of ethics has made it extremely difficult to communicate the emotional meaning and connotations of a rational view of life. Just as religion has preempted the field of ethics, turning morality against man, so it has usurped the highest moral concepts of our language.”

“Exaltation” is usually taken to mean an emotional state evoked by contemplation of the supernatural. “Worship” means the emotional experience of loyalty and dedication to something higher than Man. “Reverence” means the emotion of a sacred respect to be experienced on one’s knees. “Sacred” means superior to and not-to-be-touched-by any concerns of man of this earth, etc.”

But such concepts do name actual emotions and even though no supernatural dimension exists [her view point and mine too]. These emotions are experienced as uplifting or ennobling without the self abasement required by religious definitions. What then is their referent in reality? It is the entire realm of Man’s dedication to a moral ideal.

…

Philosophically, Nietzsche is a mystic and an irrationalist. But as a poet he projects at times, not consistently, a magnificent feeling for Man’s greatness expressed in emotional, not intellectual terms.

“It is not the works, but the belief which is here decisive and determines the order of rank-to employ once more an old religious formula with a new and deeper meaning,-it is some fundamental certainty which a noble soul has for itself, something which is not to be sought, is not to be found, and perhaps, also, not to be lost.-The noble soul has reverence for itself.-” (Friedrich Nietzsche, Beyond Good and Evil)

This view of man has rarely been expressed in human history.

[In my opinion Victor Hugo also projects such a grand view of Man in his writings, an opinion that Ayn Rand also declares in her writings.]

2006-05-02T14:48:00.000+05:30

Me running Quicksilver 50K race, late 90's. About 2h into the race, this is an awesome section with the scenery glorious, the sun bright, the trail soft, and one is lost in gentle musings running in solitude with steady even breathing reveling in the human body and nature. I love this picture: dynamism poised forward in the startling beauty of the scenery. To have run this was to have lived well.
The Quicksilver ultra is run on the 2nd Saturday of every May one day before Mother's day and quite close to my birthday. I use to run this as a celebration and have run this 8 times so far starting in 1997. The course is set in the beautiful Santa Cruz mountains of Almaden park in South San Jose. I use to wake up at 3AM to get ready. Water bottles, food packets, mineral tablets, glasses, etc. There was always a quiet tense excitement getting ready. I would toast a bagel and eat. My brother and I would setoff in the trusty Subaru Outback to the starting point. It can be quite cold in the morning even in May and so we get to the park and stay in the car warm listening to 102.1 classical FM station. All of a sudden there is a violent shake of the car and there is our old loud mouthed buddy Ken Cicinelli He forces out to get out of the car and we head off with him to meet all our numerous running buddies. There are runners who have done Western States 100 miler, etc there, tall, rugged, friendly, quiet except for Ken. Soon the rest of our gang shows up; We see the scowling humorous face of Blauschild, Bill and Dan, Mike Denise, and Mike Picardo. We start stretching, joking, laughing. Everyone is pulling Ken's leg. Soon we gather at the starting point. We are still laughing and joking and then suddenly we are off at 6AM into the early morning dawn. We are all high on adrenalin but we have a long way to go (50 KM) about 5h+ and so as soon as hit the first steep hill we quickly get into a fast walk. Pretty soon we swing onto the long single track into dense woods and try establish our rythm which is hard, going up and down slopes, especially on a crowded single track. This section is very pretty but footing is treacherous and several people wipe out. I almost do a face plant but recover just in time. I find myself running behind Rena Schumann. She is a very pretty friendly girl who is a champion ultra runner. I found that she had just placed in the 100K race a week prior! I also run for a while with Jim WHoley an old friend from HP and we catch up and start discussing GPS systems. We come across some wild turkeys, occasionally deer. We come out of the single track into more open country of gentle hills with grassy slopes. It is about 1.5h into the race. We start on a gentle uphill on a fire road meandering up the hill. Now it is time to get some water, minerals, and a GU packet of chocolate. The fast runners now just take off! This is one of the best parts of the race. The trail is soft and wide, the sun is coming up to warm our cold bodies, the breathing has settled into a steady rythm, and I begin to enjoy the feeling of bien etre. I have left my brother far behind. In sections the huge trees on either side form a beatiful Keatsian tunnel. By the 2h mark at around 20km I start to feel a little fatigued. Firtunately the 1st aid station shows up. I perk up immediately. The volunteers are very enthusiastic, noisy, kidding around as they fill your material wants. I grab some food, and also some Jujube's for the road wave goodbye and headoff. Now starts the first sustained hill climb through miners camp. I start to sweat and struggle but make my way steadily up. Run mostly and walk occasionally. Now there are no thoughts anymore. There is only will directing body to a purposive goal. All esle is unimportant. Living in the now. There is struggle and pain but somewhere in there is a joy in the exertion. I reach the top of the hill and turn right and get a gorgeous view of Mt.Amanam and the reservoir and the dam far below. I race down hill enjoying the feeling of motion and strength and savoring the beaty. Head is still clear. After the dam overlook aid station the real race starts. I struggle to McAbee point and then there is a long and sustained uphill all the way to the very top. I pass runners still coming down on the other side. Now it is a real struggle. All effort is to put one foot in front of another, sweat pouring down, head down. It is almost 4.5h into the race. The last aid station comes up at English town. Fill up my botttle, grab some fruit, M&M's for the road and speed downhill relief that it is indeed so and not up. COming to the bottom I realize in dismay that what goes down must come up and indeed the hill that I need to go up stares at me. I curse and start blindly up the hill. Now there is pure effort, hard breathing and I do everything I can to shut the pain of the effort and just keep going. I round out to the top and then hit a series of "loopdy loops" or up and down sections that really do me in. The sun is up now and with sweat streaming in rivers, water finished, flies buziing around, this is a test of pure will and purpose to not stop and rest but keep going. When I think I must have finished and am at the top of the hill, another loopdy loop! Finally I am at the top and start racing to the bottom. Racing is all relative. With my legs cramping badly my quads completely shot I try to speed up but a child could probably pass me comfortably at this point. One slope is so steep that I slide and almost fall. I finally round out at the bottom and instantly my legs "latch-up". I try to lengthen my stride/limp across the finishto the the cheers of all my waiting friends and once my Father. As I cool down and watch the other runners finish, watch kids playing in the sand in the corner watch the shadows of the forests on the hill, watch the cotton clouds in a placid azure sky there is vast contentment. A friendly volunteer serves me a hot veggie burger and I sit down to enjoy the moment hardly listening to the jabber of my friends. Happy birthday to me! Many happy returns.
On one of these races I got injured at about the 20km point. I started walking. The pain gradually grew worse. I thought of dropping from the race. It was my birthday though! How could I quit. I just kept at it. I remember on the final loopdy loop I saw a snake suddenly crossing right between my legs. I was so much in pain that I could not even jump to avoid it. Lucky for me that it did not strike. I took almost 6h 50' to complete that race. My best time was about 5:17 when I placed 3rd in my age division.

2006-05-01T14:28:00.000+05:30

AR50 (2003): 50 mile run along the beatiful American River from Sacramento to Auburn

My friend (and boss) Bill Mack and I signed up for and trained together for the 50 mile run, my 1st and his 2nd. On Saturday evening we drove from San Jose to Sacramento in his shiny BMW 745i listening to Pink Floyd, etc. We went to Fleet feet(?) running store where we picked up our race packet. It was a neat little shop with all kinds of goodies for runners such as shoes apparel, etc. We arrived at our hotel at about 6PM and checked in. We saw rugged looking long distance runner types and one of them came up and greeted us and said he remembered me from some earlier race. We shook hands and started chatting. I was amazed that so many runners remembered me till it dawned on me that I was almost the only non-white runner in the predominantly white ultra running community and so was easily marked. Bill and I had dinner at the local Olive Garden where we wolfed down enormous quantities of pasta with liberal amounts of red wine making it almost a Rabelaisian feast. I remember a pretty little girl conducting a wine tasting class while we waited for our table and who was so nice to me. Ah! she was cute. We slept early after getting all our gear ready for the morrow. The race start was at 6 AM. I got up at 4AM and quickly got ready with race bib, applied body glide all over and checked my gear. I wore raceready shorts and a Hind warm top with my runner's gloves. I had a water bottle belt with some GU and plenty of chelated electrolyte tablets. We got into the BMW and headed to the Sacramento Universtity parking lot to the start line We got out and strteched. It was a clear cold blue skied morning with temperature at 0 C. All the runners were talking excitedly in their own groups. Soon the gun went off and we were off. We looped around the parking lot and then headed across abridge over the American river (AR). The runners were still bunched up. I lost Bill at this point as he sped ahead. I would not see him till the finish. The trail is basically a paved bike trail but has soft slightly sandy shoulders that many runners including myself used to save our legs from the pounding. The river contantly bends as most rivers do but always beautiful. As the sun came up I started slowly warming up. On both sides of the trail are beatiful parks and soon we saw locals starting to come in to enjoy the Sunday. Little kids on their tricycles, etc. Soon we came cross a dam and then abruptly we headed up a steep hill. We level out and then continue on the trail but now looking down on the river from above. On both sides of the river are beatiful homes and I envy the inhabitants their view. Dogs bark in the yards as we pass. We come across a woman on horse back and my friend Jim Wholey who I ran (ha ha!) into starts hollering at her (horses are banned on the trail on that day). At about the 50KM point we come to Folsam dam and the wind really picks up and the scenery is beautiful. Suddenly I see the face of my brother Kishor as he runs toward me. This is the point we are allowed to pick up "pacers". A pacer is one who runs part of the race towards the end on long races and helps you through it. They are not allowed to carry anything of yours. I get to my drop bag and change my warm top to a singlet, jettison my gloves and after grabbing some food off the aid station start up the trail again but this time with my brother for company. My mood suddenly picks up with all of this. We start chatting and enjoy the beatiful AR winding beside us placidly. The miles go by. Our diet is consistantly of peanut butter and jelly (PJ) sandwitches and fruit with M&M's.
An elderly runner passed along side and asked if we were from India. We assented. He asked if we knew about cricket. Soon we started discussing all the players we mutually knew, players from the 70's like Andrew Roberts, Geoff Boycott, Holding, Kallicharan, Knott, etc. It turned out that man was from England and was 75Y old! He had run the Western States 100 miler several times!
One funny thing happened. I remember starting to feel tired at about the 6h point and eating some M&M's. After about 30m I felt a lot better. I figured later that my advil (ibuproffin) tablets got mixed up with my M&M's in my pocket and I bit into what I thought was a bad M&M. Actually an advil! The advil kicked in and killed my pain! At one point as I was staggering a bit I asked my brother to relate some of his difficult cases: He is a pediatric cardiologist. Soon I was engrossed in listening to his life and death stories and complex cases and how he saved so many beautiful children and forgot my pain. At about the 9h mark I still felt pretty strong. We finally veered of from the river and headed up a steep hill. I started strong up hill and left Kishor behind. At the aid station when he finally showed up after me the volunteer got a good laugh that I was stronger than my pacer.
We caught up with an old man, then 3 ladies running together and finally finished after 10h 18'. It felt great to have run 80KM continuously after having trained hard for several months through the winter season of Cailfornia.

2006-04-26T10:56:00.000+05:30

Thyagayya Movie, Periodic Simultaneity of Geniuii across Globe
I watched an old Telugu musical called Thyagayya starring Somayajulu in the VCD format on our big screen in the Supramental room with dad. Naveen and Poonam were specially invited by Dad to come and enjoy. Dad was ecstatic as each song rolled by trying to fully explain the meaning and Bhava in each of the songs. Although not chauvinistic about most things I have to admit a lurking one in for Telugu language and food. The movie was capped by a nice "Telugu" dinner with Pesarattu. I was disappointed that many of my favorite songs did not make the cut in the movie like "Sita Kalyana..Vybhogamae", his Tillana number, etc. Rama worked a miracle :-) I went to get my usual glass of evening wine but Rama made it go bad ( I had to dump it) such that I could not "pollute" the viewers "sanctity" in their devotional mood. It shook the foundations of my agnosticsm :-)
It is curious to examine following seeming co-incidence: Great music composers across the globe existing roughly simultaneously during the period of 1750-1850. Vivaldi, Bach, Mozart, Beethoven, Schubert, Haydn(s), Rossini, Thyagaraja, etc. Have we seen such a effusion of musical spirits in any other period in known history? I get a similar feeling when I view how great philosophers and artists seemingly originated at roughly the same time across the globe in the following periods: 500-200 BC: Greek contingent in Europe, Buddha in India, Confucius in China, etc. - how the middle ages were dark across the world not just Europe dominated mostly by religion-and 1650-1850 Newton, Locke, Spinoza, Descartes, Voltaire, Kant, etc. Of course this was mostly a pan-European and not global.

2006-02-08T13:33:00.000+05:30

2006-02-08T13:09:00.000+05:30

Kids at Leela Palace Hotel
Rahul getting peice of cake of 20th Anniversary of Avasarala
Chairman, cutting the cake
THE CAKE!!!
Kids and Kishore at Back of Leela Palace Hotel

2006-02-08T12:54:00.000+05:30

Kids goofinng off with my sound system in Supramental Room
Preparing for Avasarala's 20th anniversary in Supramental Room

2006-02-08T12:46:00.000+05:30

Kids with Chandu, Putting at Eagleton
Sanjay, guitaring, eyes closed!

2006-02-08T12:34:00.000+05:30

Kids with Grandparents

2006-02-08T11:52:00.000+05:30

Kids with Grandpa on a visit to Avasarala Automation, Dec 2005, enjoying "El Neeru".

Outside the Front Lobby of Avasarala

2006-02-02T09:49:00.000+05:30

With Kids at Adiga's Darshini after Lalbagh Run, Dec.2005

2006-01-31T13:21:00.000+05:30

Andal utsava idol

2006-01-31T13:17:00.001+05:30

procession: Mami with Naveen and Dad

2006-01-31T13:17:00.000+05:30

Andal (right carrier is uncle of Vasanthi)

2006-01-31T13:14:00.000+05:30

procession con't

2006-01-31T13:12:00.000+05:30

procession cont'd

2006-01-31T13:11:00.001+05:30

Andal Kalyana Samagri

2006-01-31T13:11:00.000+05:30

Procession of Andal Bride's party streets of Chrompet

2006-01-31T13:10:00.000+05:30

Vasanthi showing Andal's Mangala Suthram to Sreeram mama

2006-01-31T13:08:00.000+05:30

Dad and Rama, Guruji's eldest daughter visiting from MD

2006-01-31T12:51:00.001+05:30

Myers enjoying Fresh Coconut Milk at Avasarala Technologies, Bangalore, India.

2006-01-31T12:51:00.000+05:30

Myers with Dad, Mani Uncle and Ravi

2006-01-31T12:48:00.000+05:30

Prof Meyer and Liz with Mr. Ramdas, VP of Avasarala Technologies at Bangalore India

2006-01-31T12:35:00.000+05:30